Old lady at car: Henry, wait for me!
Old man carrying beach chairs half a block ahead of her: Dammit, Agnes, I’m going! I’ve been waiting for you for 40 years!
–Beach near Naples, Florida
Overheard by: X
Old lady at car: Henry, wait for me!
Old man carrying beach chairs half a block ahead of her: Dammit, Agnes, I’m going! I’ve been waiting for you for 40 years!
–Beach near Naples, Florida
Overheard by: X
Local dude, trying to get me to buy a jet-ski ride: You can drink and drive. It’s paradise!
–Paradise Island, The Bahamas
Overheard by: Drunken Swimmer
Foreign girl: Hello. I just bought this bike. I need a special instrument to raise the seat. Can you help me?
Guy #1: We might. Do you need a wrench?
Foreign girl: Oh. I don’t know…[giggles]Guy #2: Where are you from?
Foreign girl: Belarus.
Guy #1: Why did you decide to come to the US?
Foreign girl, excitedly: I came for work and pleasure! I work at Subway!
Guy #2: This is so stereotypical teen movie.
Foreign girl: Does that mean you can fix my bike?
Guy #1: Do you wanna come inside and get drunk with us?
–5 Kings Row, Dewey Beach, Delaware
Five-year old boy whining to dad: Let’s go boogie-board.
Dad: No! You know my nipples get raw if I go without a shirt on…
–Newport Beach, California
Overheard by: Lilian
Girl #1: Come on, get in the water.
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s nice.
Girl #3: No way! There are sharks!
Girl #1: There aren’t any sharks.
Girl #3: Oh yeah? Then why are there so many bubbles?
–Robert Moses Beach, New York
20-something guy: If someone offered you a thousand dollars to let them break your leg, would you say yes? I would. I'd say “hell yeah, break that shit in half!”
–Siesta Key, Florida
Dude stopping intense make-out: Um, you’re not gonna tell anyone about this…
Chick: What?!
Dude: Well, I mean, look at you…
Chick: I’m going to tell your mom about this.
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Overheard by: Mik
College guy, passing campus soccer field: Kick those balls, girl!
–Long Beach, California
Hobo: Come on, people! How about this? Put a penny in my bucket and I'll go back to Venice and leave you all the fuck alone!
–Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: Zoe
Wife: Do you want any sauce?
Husband: No, just ketchup for my fries.
Wife: Ketchup *is* a sauce!
Husband: No, tartar sauce is a sauce. Ketchup is just ketchup.
–Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: ISPgypsy
