Woman at outdoor restaurant, to waiter: Could you please turn down the air conditioning? I'm cold.
–Waikiki, Hawaii
Woman at outdoor restaurant, to waiter: Could you please turn down the air conditioning? I'm cold.
–Waikiki, Hawaii
Long Island wife: Shawn! Shawn, you idiot, your son wants to come swimming with you!
Long Island husband: Did you just call me an idiot?
[A fight erupts and wife is so upset she starts packing.]Long Island husband: What are you doing? You said you wanted to go to the beach today!
Long Island wife: We’ve been to the beach, and the beach fucking sucks!
–West Palm Beach, Florida
Overheard by: sat near them on the plane going home two days later, too
Little boy #1: It’s my turn to use the boogie board! Mom said you have to share!
Little boy #2: Oh yeah? Well, too bad, ’cause I’m not gonna share!
Little boy #1: Oh yeah? Well, I just peed in your wetsuit!
–Long Beach, New York
Overheard by: RPLB 2000
Girl #1: So I remembered to raise my eyebrows in the picture… Hey, want to see? (pulls out driver's license).
Girl #2: I just leave mine in the car.
Girl #1: Your eyebrows?
–Hartford, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Eating icecream at the time
“Jews for Jesus” guy: You like Superman? Take this pamphlet. Read it with all your friends. It will be story time!
Hands out pamphlet that metaphorically describes Jesus as Superman.
Girl: I didn’t realize Jews worshipped Superman.
–Jones Beach, New York
Frat boy to others: Duuuuuude, let's go in the brocean!
–New Jersey
Overheard by: Jersey Girl
Kid #1: Wanna make a sand castle?
Kid #2: I don’t like you.
Kid #1: Wanna go swimming?
Kid #2: I don’t like you.
Kid #1: Wanna go eat ice cream?
Kid #2: Wanna go die?
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Mandy
20-year-old speaking to friends: Why didn't you guys take me to hospital?
–Dee Why Beach, Sydney, Australia
Dumb meatheads to dumb girls: So we’ve got triscuits and flavor-blasted goldfish back at our condo if you want to come with us.
–Siesta Beach, Florida
Lifeguard on megaphone: Attention, beach-goers, due to the sunset, you must get out in 5 minutes or else we will turn the waves off.
Girl: Oh my God! Is he serious?!
–Huntington Beach, California
