Little girl: Do you have a stronger brain or a stronger heart?
Dad: Who?
Little girl: You?
Dad: Both.
–Rye, New York
Overheard by: Lobster
Little girl: Do you have a stronger brain or a stronger heart?
Dad: Who?
Little girl: You?
Dad: Both.
–Rye, New York
Overheard by: Lobster
Tween in one-piece: Amber’s parents let her wear a bikini.
Dad: But her parents love her.
Teen brother: No, they don’t. She’s just a 10-year-old slut.
–Lake Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canadia
Overheard by: Jenny
Little boy, somewhat sheepishly: Dad, are you fascinated by rocks?
Dad, sincerely enthusiastic: I love rocks!
–Venice Beach, California
Girl: Hey, Daddy, look, I am riding a giant sand penis.
Daddy: I really don’t want to ever hear you say that again.
Girl: Daddy, do you want to ride the giant sand penis?
–Biloxi, Mississippi
Overheard by: Lori Lou Who
Man with small child on his shoulders, rubbing his bald head: Rub harder! Make a wish!
–Bethany Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: Arlene M Franks
20-Something daughter: Dad! Hurry up and take the picture; mom’s pressing her boobs into my back!
Mom: I’m sorry! You suckled from these boobs, you know.
20-Something daughter: Well, clearly I quit for a reason.
Dad: Yeah. Because you were too tired of fighting me for them.
–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: Kate
Little boy: Dad, what kind of birds are these?
Dad: Those are pigeons, but at the seaside they will call them ‘seagulls’!
–Ostseebad Damp, Germany
Overheard by: Pascal
Foreign single father: So, are you guys having fun at the beach?
Son: Actually, yeah — it’s fun.
Foreign single father: Next time, have positive attitude from the start.
Son: No, that was ’cause before when you said, ‘Let’s go to the beach,’ I thought we were gonna visit Mom.
–Lake Erie, Ontario, Canadia
Overheard by: native english speaker
Little boy: Daddy, look what I found in the sand!
Father: Don’t touch it. I don’t know what it is, but don’t touch it.
–Jungle Gym, Coney Island Beach, New York
