Offers and requests

Guido: I really wanna get a tan today.
Bored girl: Sure.
Guido: Do you think there's enough sun to get a tan today?
Bored girl: I don't know. Maybe.
Guido: Will going in the water help me get a tan?
Bored girl: It might.
Guido: I really wanna get tan.
Bored girl: So where are you going to college?

–Coney Island

Dude #1: Bro, you want a beer?
Dude #2: Nah, I'm not drinking for Ramadan.

–Auckland, New Zealand

Man #1: Man, I’ve got some sandy nuts. Sannndy nuuuts!
Man #2: Dude, shake it over there. You’re getting your nut-sand all over me.

–Ocean Beach, San Diego, California

Overheard by: Daryl

Guy: Hey, do you have any gum?
Annoying girl: Yeah, I do… You can't have this one, but you can have this kind. (pulls gum out of bra)
Guy: Ew! I don't want that! It's titty gum.
Annoying girl: It's not titty gum.
Brunette girl: You can have some of my gum.
Guy: Is it in your titties?
Brunette girl, looking down shirt. Nope.
Guy: Okay!

–Canadia

Guy: Would you like something to wipe off with?
Girl: No, I prefer to be covered in sand and cum.
Guy: Great! Same time tomorrow?

–Hollywood, Florida

Overheard by: Miles Highclub

Girl on cell: Hey! I'm having a barbecue tonight! You should totally come over to my place and drink juice. And by “juice,” I mean sooodaaaa.

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Woman: Can I rent a beach chair?
Lifeguard (just off duty on the last day of the season): Fuck you, dumb cunt.

–Panama City Beach, Florida

Girl to two guys: Do you guys have a spare cigarette?
Guy #1: Yeah, here ya go. (gives her a cigarette)
Girl to guy #2: How about you?

–St. Kilda Beach, Melbourne, Australia

Overheard by: lorax

Mom: Hey! Tell them the new teenager attitude sound.
Uncle: Pfft.
Girl #1: Yeah, that’s spelled P-F-F-T.
Girl #2: Doesn’t it have, like, an ‘H’ in it or something? Like P-H-F-F-T?
Uncle: You don’t even have to have the ‘T’ in it. You could definitely go without the ‘T.’

–Inverhuron, Ontario, Canadia

Overheard by: sun-fried brain

Teen girl: It’s so freakin’ hot out! What are we gonna do?
Teen guy: We could go on the ferris wheel.
Teen girl: Are you kidding? For all five of us it would cost, like, a hundred dollars!

–Ocean City, New Jersey

Overheard by: Rafaela