Stoned nerd (talking about his sub order): I've got six inches!
Stoned girl: Lucky. I got the lesbian choice, a fuckin' sandwich. Cuz the sandwich is like a vagina and the sub is like a dick, ya know?
Stoned nerd: No, I totally understand. And I'm okay with that.

–Wawa, Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Waitress: Do you want cheddar, mozzarella, or Swiss on your burger?
Customer: Um… American?

–The Purple Parrot, Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: Hollywood

Teenage boy #1, neck deep in water: Aw, dude! My phone was in my pocket!
Teenage boy #2: (silence)
Teenage boy #1: Dude! I just found a hundred dollar bill!
Teenage boy #2: (silence)
Teenage boy #1: Man, I love that Xbox 360.
Teenage boy #2: Yeah man, yeah!

–Bethany Beach, Delaware

Mother to teen daughter: I want the stuff they won’t let you buy.

–Medicine aisle of supermarket, Bethany Beach, Delaware

Queer looking at screaming queer in water: Maybe I’m not gay.

–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: laughing entirely too much

Man with small child on his shoulders, rubbing his bald head: Rub harder! Make a wish!

–Bethany Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: Arlene M Franks

Man: In Europe, all little children are naked.

–Bethany Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: I heard about that

Mom to child: Now, don’t get all sandy!

–Bethany Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: Emily

Girl: In my head I’m like, ‘Have you looked in the mirror, Seinfeld? You look like a fuckin’ beached whale.’ God, I love him.

–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: Brittney

Little girl, pointing to man in Speedo: Mom, what’s that?
Mother: That’s his swimsuit.
Little girl: No, what’s in his swimsuit?

–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware