Sports

Jock #1: So I heard about this champion high school wrestler on Real Sports who has no legs.
Jock #2: That’s awesome. Good for him. I never won a championship in high school.
Punk, walking by: You know what’s better then being a state championship wrestler with no legs?
Both jocks: What?
Punk: Having legs!

–Pearl Street, Beach Haven, New Jersey

Overheard by: andrew dean

Jock #1: Woah! I am so down for some volleyball!
Jock #2: Bocce ball!
Jock #1: Bocce is huge.
Jock #2: Man, I feel like a kid in a candy store… Yo, I am so into this bocce ball.
Jock #1: Bocce is huge.

–Dr. Gravity’s Kite Shop, Harwichport, Massachusetts

Overheard by: jon wazoo

Drunk guy: I’m scared of you… You look dangerous, like you could beat somebody up.
Drunk girl: What? Why?
Drunk guy: It’s the headband, you look like you know karate.
Drunk girl: I don’t know karate, I know yoga.

–Beaufort, South Carolina

Overheard by: Wish I had that logic….

Jogging man to jogging woman: I still have a jiggling six-pack.

–English Bay, Vancouver, Canadia

Overheard by: if it's jiggling, it ain't no six-pack

Redneck girl: Frank was out fishing with the guy who drowned yesterday.
Redneck boyfriend: Did he try to save him?
Redneck girl: No, he was fishing — I told you. He thought he had one on the line.
Redneck boyfriend: Did he?
Redneck girl: No, it was just the water.
Redneck boyfriend: I thought you were gonna say it was the guy who drowned.

–Holland State Park, Michigan

Overheard by: Townie

50-something to friend: I've been married so long I can row a boat with a rope.

–Horseshoe Beach, Florida

High school girl #1: Wait, Muhammad Ali the boxer or the dictator?
High school girl #2: What planet do you come from where Muhammad Ali is a dictator?
High school girl #1: Florida.

–West Palm Beach, Florida

High school girl #1: Wait, Muhammad Ali the boxer or the dictator?
High school girl #2: What planet do you come from where Muhammad Ali is a dictator?
High school girl #1: Florida.

–West Palm Beach, Florida

Man #1, hanging up cell: By the volleyball net? You can't find anyone at this beach by telling them “I'm by the volleyball net.” That's like going downtown and telling someone “I'm by the pizza place.”
Man #2: Or, “I'm by the hobo.”

–Jericho Beach, Vancouver, Canadia

Overheard by: Emimac

Walker #1: So I think I am going to train for the LA marathon.
Walker #2: Really? What’s the cause?
Walker #1: Well, it’s for AIDS. Not that I have AIDS, nor know anyone who does.
Walker #2: Yeah, well, we all know AIDS is bad.

–Olympic & La Cienega Park, Los Angeles, California