Teen meathead #1: What are you?
Teen meathead #2: 100% Italian.
Teen meathead #1: Oh, really? That's mad cool.
Teen meathead #2: Yeah, but my brother is all different things–he's like Jewish and Irish and stuff.
–Lido Beach West, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: ally
Lifeguard: What happened to your toenail?
Little boy: A monster carried it off a while ago. Around kindergarten, I think.
–Long Beach, California
Overheard by: Super Sexy Woman
Crackhead: Yeah, I’m kind of known around here as the sheriff of the North Shore.
Local guy: Yeah? Well, then I’m the mayor.
Passing Australian surfer: I want to be prime minister.
–Sunset Beach, Oahu, Hawaii
Overheard by: Jehan
Little kid to mom, as storm is coming: If thunder claps while you're in the water, you're gonna die!
–Pawley's Island, South Carolina
Overheard by: Running for Cover
Girl, carrying piece of kelp to dad: This can be my pet until we get a doggie!
–Hermosa Beach, California
Guy sharing Ferris wheel with family: Good thing they fixed this cart, it was broken yesterday.
Old lady: Have you ever been slapped by a complete stranger?
–Coney Island, New York
Overheard by: girl #1
Man, carrying two hands full of knives: Knives for sale! Knives for sale! 100 dollars! Getting tired of your brother, your cousin, your mother-in-law? Knives for sale! You feeling suicidal? Knives! Knives for sale! 100 dollars!
–Montego Bay, Jamaica
Overheard by: Elle
Hobo: Got any spare change?
Attractive girl: No, sorry.
Hobo: How about a phone number?
–Venice Beach, California
Overheard by: Amber
Hobo: Got any spare change?
Attractive girl: No, sorry.
Hobo: How about a phone number?
–Venice Beach, California
Overheard by: Amber
