Woman: I am talking, and you are farting. That’s nice!
–Balmy Beach, Toronto, Ontario
Overheard by: nfh
Woman: I am talking, and you are farting. That’s nice!
–Balmy Beach, Toronto, Ontario
Overheard by: nfh
Lady on cell: And sushi (points at her chihuahua) stops to look for you, but I tell her you're at work and she laughs.
–Tamarama Beach, Australia
Overheard by: GGary
Older lady #1: You know they have a hot stone massage?
Older lady #2: Really?
Older lady #1: Yeah! It sounds really nice.
Older lady #2: Maybe we should get them! Then we can get shirts that say “I got stoned in Miami”
Older lady #1, laughing: We could.
Older lady #2: No, but I actually want to get them and wear that shirt.
–Elemis Spa, Miami Beach, Florida
Young woman: I am so not doing that again. One, it’s gross, and two, my legs are killing me.
–Chatham Light Beach, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Antonia
Jersey woman, to seagull: Get away, you lazy sonofabitch! Go find your own food! [to friends] Just like Mexicans.
–Wildwood, New Jersey
Overheard by: Dan
Woman on cell: No, it wasn’t a yeast infection. It’s not a fishy smell, and I have cramps. I never get cramps!… Yeah…Maybe that’s why he’s not calling me back.
–Coney Island, New York
Overheard by: Kimmie David
Middle-aged lady #1: He keeps calling me on the cell phone telling me he’ll be right there and I’m like, ‘I’ve been waiting 25 years, I’m leaving!’
Middle-aged lady #2: And my poor granddaughter is there, and we’re all hugging on each other…
–Cabrillo Beach, California
Overheard by: confused
Woman #1: Honey, I think I need a bigger size. Somethin’ to hold some considerable inches…What did you get?
Woman #2: A twelve.
Woman #1: Ooh, I don’t have that many inches.
Woman #2: Bitch.
–Swim Shop, Passagrille, Florida
Woman #1: Italian men make the best lovers.
Woman #2: Why?
Woman #1: They have lots of stamina. They last longer and their penises are bigger.
Woman #2: What’s the opposite of that?
–Wellfleet, Massachusetts
