Teenage girl #1: Yeah, my dad’s getting re‐married this summer.
Teenage girl #2: Omigod, my dad just got one of those Filipino mail order brides, and let me tell you, they make the best egg rolls ever.

–Nassau, Bahamas

Overheard by: Spring Break wooooo!

18‐year‐old girl #1: I wonder what we’ll be like in college…
18‐year‐old girl #2: I think I’ll be a slut.

–Cable Beach, Bahamas

Overheard by: Rachel

College guy: First of all, this isn’t real life. This is vacation.

–Coco Cay, Bahamas

Overheard by: Madi

Local dude, trying to get me to buy a jet‐ski ride: You can drink and drive. It’s paradise!

–Paradise Island, The Bahamas

Overheard by: Drunken Swimmer

Drunk woman to woman coming out of water with snorkeling mask: Oh, I was thinking about getting one of those! Is it worth the money?
Woman in mask: Absolutely! There’s tons of sea urchins, coral, plants, fish…
Drunk woman: Tropical?

–Atlantis Resort Cove Beach, Bahamas

Overheard by: Maggie

Girl with lower standards: I think you should go out with Spook. Yeah, I like him for you.
Girl with higher standards: He’s a drug dealer. Why would I want to date a drug dealer?
Girl with lower standards: He’s not a drug dealer.
Girl with higher standards: He sells me weed all the time.
Girl with lower standards: That’s just his part‐time job.

–Cabbage Beach, Paradise Island, Bahamas

Italian MC on the PA: Fifteen minutes to Bocce ball tournament, volleyball tournament… Sex on the beach! Beer tournament at six!

–Fortuna Beach, Grand Bahama Island

Six‐year‐old boy, fully dressed in Lacoste: I am almost your age.
Father, fully dressed in Lacoste: You are not almost my age.

–Atlantis Resort & Casino, Bahamas

Tourist woman: You know, I heard this island is completely surrounded by water all the way around!

–Coco Cay, Bahamas

Overheard by: Shelley

Chubby eight‐year‐old boy, walking and kicking sand up with his feet: Woah! Ma! Look at this! They’ve even got real sand here!
Exasperated mom, clutching French fries: No shit! It’s real sand! Buying fake sand would be dumb. Everyone would steal it.

–The Bahamas

Overheard by: Fake sand maker