Lifeguard to wading mother: That girl is too small. She can't be out that far. She has to be within arm's length.
Mother: How far is arm's length?
–Jericho Beach, Vancouver, Canadia
Overheard by: hefferlump
Lifeguard to wading mother: That girl is too small. She can't be out that far. She has to be within arm's length.
Mother: How far is arm's length?
–Jericho Beach, Vancouver, Canadia
Overheard by: hefferlump
Mom: Hey! Tell them the new teenager attitude sound.
Uncle: Pfft.
Girl #1: Yeah, that’s spelled P-F-F-T.
Girl #2: Doesn’t it have, like, an ‘H’ in it or something? Like P-H-F-F-T?
Uncle: You don’t even have to have the ‘T’ in it. You could definitely go without the ‘T.’
–Inverhuron, Ontario, Canadia
Overheard by: sun-fried brain
Woman to husband, pointing at fat girl: Is she pregnant?
Husband: I don't know.
Woman: I'll ask Beth, Beth knows everything.
–Centennial Beach, British Columbia, Canadia
World’s best wife: Honey, twelve o’clock.
Clueless husband: Huh? No, it’s not. It’s two-thirty.
World’s best wife: I mean twelve o’clock.
Clueless husband: I don’t get you.
World’s best wife: Look straight ahead.
Clueless husband: Why?
World’s best wife: Look at the hot chick right in front of you! Look! Look!
Clueless husband: Oh!…Niiice.
–Grand Beach, Manitoba
Foreign single father: So, are you guys having fun at the beach?
Son: Actually, yeah — it’s fun.
Foreign single father: Next time, have positive attitude from the start.
Son: No, that was ’cause before when you said, ‘Let’s go to the beach,’ I thought we were gonna visit Mom.
–Lake Erie, Ontario, Canadia
Overheard by: native english speaker
Annoyingly loud blonde: You did it in the ocean?!
–Olde Angel Inn Pub, Niagara-on-the-Lake, Canadia
Hot dad: No, it's because I prefer other foods.
Small boy clinging to his back: Like people poopy?
–Vancouver Sea Walk, Canada
Overheard by: Rosie
Blonde girl: Oh… I had sex with your brother last night.
Brunette girl: Oh, yeah?
Blonde girl: He has a huge cock.
Brunette girl: Oh my god! I know!
Blonde girl: Too bad he has herpes.
Brunette girl: I know…
–Burlington Beach, Ontario, Canadia
Overheard by: Alrighty…..
20-something girl #1: So everyone thinks that Nate gave Aric that hickey last night when they were joking around in the kitchen, and Brandon is kinda mad now, he already told Nate not to give other boys hickeys anymore.
20-something girl #2: Oh, poor Brandon, why does Nate do that?
20-something girl #1: Oh, that so wasn't what I was talking about, Nate didn't even do it!
20-something girl #2: What? How else would Aric have gotten it then? After the kitchen thing we all went to bed, didn't we?
20-something girl #1: Yes…
20-something girl #2: Wait, where did Aric sleep last night?
20-something girl #1: Um.
20-something girl #2: It was you! You hickeyed Aric! What are you, twelve?
–Sauble Beach, Ontario, Canada
Jogging man to jogging woman: I still have a jiggling six-pack.
–English Bay, Vancouver, Canadia
Overheard by: if it's jiggling, it ain't no six-pack
