Questions

Girl #1: Oh, man! So, for Christmas my dad is letting me get my cartilidge pierced! I’m so excited!
Girl #2: Oh, man, that’s so cool! I want to get mine done, too.
Girl #1: Yeah, I’ll only ever get my ears pierced. Everything else is so gross and weird.
Girl #3: Yeah, well, I have my clit pierced — do you think that’s weird?
Girl #2: What’s a clit?

–Nags Head, North Carolina

Random high school girl: So then I looked at her and said, “Shit, bitch, what's your fucking problem?”
Random high school guy: Were they Mexican?
Girl: Uh-huh.
Guy: Well, were they sexy Mexicans?
Girl: Yes, deary, they were Sexicans.

–Rat Beach, California

Overheard by: where can i find them?

Hick tourist, pointing to the ocean: So is that there salt water?
Island Beach State Park worker, after long confused pause: It's the ocean.
Hick tourist: Yeah, but does it like, have salt in it?

–Island Beach State Park, New Jersey

Overheard by: sick of bennies

Woman: Excuse me, is that Catalina?
Man: No, Catalina is over there.
Woman: Oh, well, what island is that?
Man: Um, that’s a ship.

–Palos Verdes, California

Over-dressed and self-important guy on cell: No, no, it was some sort of implement she was calling us… No… Rubber? A douchebag? I’ve heard that before.

–Pacific Palisades, California

Overheard by: ear of the betafish

American female tourist #1: So what did you say your favorite condoment was ?
American female tourist #2: Trojans!
American male tourist: You kiddin … Mine is Europe, every time!

–Holland America Cruise, Mediterrean Sea

Overheard by: Vennfix

Little girl: What does that sign mean?
Father: That means ‘Pedestrians,’ sweetie.
Little girl: Are we pedestrians?
Father: Yes, we are.
Little girl: Oh… I thought we were Catholics.

–Beach near Amsterdam, North Holland, Netherlands

Overheard by: Daan

Little boy: Dad, what's the navy?
Dad: It's the army, but with boats.

–South Haven, Michigan

Old man to wife, in Russian: What sign are you?
Woman: I'm a fish.
Old man: Shark, son of a bitch.

–Hallandale Beach Boulevard, Florida

Overheard by: superemanuella

Little girl: Why is the ghost still here?
Dad: She just likes to come back and say hi from the spirit world.
Little girl: But why does she throw books?
Dad: She doesn't throw books, she just likes to read. And she's a little drunk.

–Hotel Del Coronado, San Diego, California