Offers and requests

Hobo: Got any spare change?
Attractive girl: No, sorry.
Hobo: How about a phone number?

–Venice Beach, California

Overheard by: Amber

Hobo: Got any spare change?
Attractive girl: No, sorry.
Hobo: How about a phone number?

–Venice Beach, California

Overheard by: Amber

Guy: Okay, first person to find a used condom wins a prize!

–Coney Island Beach, New York

Sister: Would you like to see some sea life?
Brother, pointing at three women sunbathing topless: Eww, this isn’t Europe!
Sister: Eli, just look away.

–Rockway Beach, NY

Man: Come back in the water with me.
Boy: No. You tried to drown me! You almost killed me!
Man: Well. You shouldn't have kicked me.
Boy: Kickin' someone in the ding-dong ain't gonna kill them.
Man: It might.

–Destin, Florida

Girl to friend: Can I have some of your penis jelly?

–Ft. Lauderdale, Florida

American girl #1: So, did you bring the book?
American girl #2: What book?
American girl #1: The book.
American girl #2: Ohh… Ant farm?
American girl #1: No. The bible. Fucking idiot.

–Aix en Provence, France

Overheard by: Ant Farm pretty much IS the Bible

Hyper seven-year-old: Sit!
Frazzled mother: Who are you talking to?
Hyper seven-year-old, matter-of-factly: Myself.

–Taco Bell, Deerfield Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Kiwi

Cute toddler to friends: Whoever has a dog, raise your hand… so I can murder it!

–Belmar, New Jersey

Overheard by: Willy

Golden girl: Excuse me, bartender!
(harried bartender grunts at her)
Golden girl: Bartender, can I just have an ice cube please?
(harried bartender fills a cup with ice cubes and slams it down in front of her)
Golder girl: What am I supposed to do with all of these? I just wanted one to put in my bra!

–Colony Hotel, Delray Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Becka Dash