Girl #1 (as girl #2 drops towel around her waist): Showin’ off the goods?
Girl #2: I don’t need your sass mouth.
–Manhattan Beach, California
Girl #1 (as girl #2 drops towel around her waist): Showin’ off the goods?
Girl #2: I don’t need your sass mouth.
–Manhattan Beach, California
Little girl, very afraid of the toilet: No!
Girl’s frustrated mother: Go to the bathroom. It’s not going to hurt you. I promise!
Girl: No!
Mother: Please! I’ll be standing right here. Nothing will happen.
Girl: No no no no no!
Mother: Goddammit, Kylie! You can’t hold you poop in forever!
–Newport Beach, California
Overheard by: Millie
40‐year‐old yuppie man: Yeah! I think a detox kiosk is a great idea!
–La Jolla, California
Overheard by: Confetti Bomb
German: We’ll see the Grand Canyon, Las Vegas, and Disneyland. Then on the second day…
–Los Angeles, California
Teenage girl: Aw, look at the little kid. He’s digging a hole to nowhere. How cute!
Teenage boy, completely serious: He’s digging to China, you stupid bitch!
–Long Beach, California
Overheard by: Marie
Woman: I really hate diets. I mean, I guess I could start smoking. But isn’t that bad for your lungs or something?
–Santa Barbara, California
Overheard by: something like that
Angry mother: Wash your damn hands!
Dirty son: No!
Angry mother: Wash your damn hands, Justin!
Dirty son: [Sticks his hands in the clogged sink.]Angry mother: Use the fucking soap. You just gave the dog his medicine in his butt.
Dirty son: No way, I already stuck my hands in my mouth.
–In‐N‐Out Burger, Long Beach, California
Beach‐goer: Holy shit! Is that a squirrel in your panties?!
–Newport Beach, California
Overheard by: BAJAZEUS
Lifeguard on megaphone: Attention, beach‐goers, due to the sunset, you must get out in 5 minutes or else we will turn the waves off.
Girl: Oh my God! Is he serious?!
–Huntington Beach, California
Man: … So I just walked out of there with two heads of cabbages and a hand full of cash… And I walked up to him and said, ‘Give me that goat!’
–Restaurant, Mammoth, California
