Wishes

Beach vendor #1: Ice cold corona! Aaargh!
Beach vendor #2: Ice cold water, beer! Aaargh!
Beach vendor #1: Yo, we need wigs.
Beach vendor #2: Next time I'm wearing a pirate costume, don't get it twisted.
Beach vendor #1: Ice cold corona, aargh!

–Brighton Beach, New York

College girl to college guys carving dragon in the sand: Ugh! What is wrong with you?! Dragons do not have such muscular arms!
College guy: Ours does!
College girl: I am torn: do I continue arguing about tiny dragon arms as if dragons are real or move on to mocking you for giving your dragon the biceps you wish you had?

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Old man: I think it's too late to swim, the oil is washing up on the beach.
Old woman: Yeah, it's too late for a lot of things now.
Old man: We should move back to Detroit. It's less polluted.
Old woman: I don't want to die in Detroit. Remember, we had this conversation already.

–Pier, St Petersburg, Florida

Overheard by: Sandy Paws

Little boy: I don't want to put on sunscreen!
Older sister: Do you want to look like a Nang?
Little boy: What?
Older sister: Well, that's the thing about Nangs, they get burnt!

–Byron Bay, Australia

Activist #1: Hey girls, want to save the world together?
Girl #1: Ummmm…
Activist #2: Do you like our planet?
Girl #2: Eh, I've been to better. Thanks, but no thanks.

–Seal Beach, California

Spring breaker girls to group of 30-something guys: Hey, you guys want us to take your picture for you?
Guys: Huh?
Girls: Do you want us to take the shot?
Guys: A shot? Tequila? You girls like patron? Waitress! Shots!
Girls: Wow, that was easy…

–Key West, Florida

Sailor #1, in bathroom: Ew! I saw your dick!
Sailor #2: Ew! You wish!

–Pensacola, Florida

Overheard by: disturbed roommate

Woman to another, trying to get support to protect the seals: Yeah, my daughter's friend wants to be a marine biologist. She is so smart.
Daughter's friend, in confused voice: Hey, I got gum on my camera.

–Children's Beach, La Jolla, California

Camp counselor: Hurry up, or you’ll be left behind!
Kid: Then I’d get to stay here. Awesome!
Camp counselor: Frankly, it’s my last day, so I really don’t care.

–Third Beach, Newport, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Bored Beyond the Beach

Teenage girl: So I’ve decided not to be a slut anymore.

–Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey