Old man: I think it's too late to swim, the oil is washing up on the beach.
Old woman: Yeah, it's too late for a lot of things now.
Old man: We should move back to Detroit. It's less polluted.
Old woman: I don't want to die in Detroit. Remember, we had this conversation already.
–Pier, St Petersburg, Florida
Overheard by: Sandy Paws
Older guy: We had dinner there earlier in the week. I got food poisoning.
Young kayaking guide: Really? Was it good?
–York Beach, Maine
Old lady: This isn’t a nude beach!
Young lady, sunbathing topless and feigning surprise: Oh, really? Oh, okay…
–Auckland, New Zealand
Overheard by: Shakira
Elderly lady: Come now, y’all! Key West is gonna be loads of fun! They gots the Ripley’s and Cuban people!
–Lido deck, The Carnival Glory, Key West
Overheard by: y’all need an icepack on dat thang?
Grandma: So aren't you coming to visit me in 3 weeks.
Granddaughter: No, like 2 weeks and 6 days.
–Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Guy sharing Ferris wheel with family: Good thing they fixed this cart, it was broken yesterday.
Old lady: Have you ever been slapped by a complete stranger?
–Coney Island, New York
Overheard by: girl #1
Granddaughter: Did you have fun in Hong Kong?
Grandma: Well, yes, there was a lot of Asian food.
Grandpa: And the people were all shorter than you!
Granddaughter: Really…
–Jetty Road, Glenelg, Australia
Little girl: Grandma, you’re old!
Grandma: How old do you think I am, sweetie?
Little girl: I dunno… like, 16, or something.
–Wilmington, North Carolina
Old lady #1: He told me he has never lasted more than three minutes with anyone!
Old lady #2: Really?? That poor, poor woman of his. No wonder she got a boob job and bites her nails so much.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
