Florida

Blonde: I just can’t believe Justin Timberlake can dance like that!
Black guy: I can. It’s 2007 — brothers are intelligent and white girls got booty.

–Venice Beach, Florida

Overheard by: slamber

Girl to boy showing a picture: This is for Valentine’s Day.
Boy: Umm… That’s really disturbing, is it a bouquet of penises?
Girl: It’s not disturbing! It’s for Valentine’s. (pause) Wait, did you just say “penises”?

–Tampa, Florida

Petite and topless blonde: When I get my boobs done, I’m gonna like… Walk around school with my tits out all the time.

–South Beach, Miami, Florida

Overheard by: mar

White girl: So, what are you doing in Miami?
Black guy: We’re here for the pussy.

–South Beach, Miami, Florida

Girl to boyfriend: All I have to do is finish this project, and I got my degree!
Boyfriend: You know what’s a degree? Your vagina!

–Gulf Coast University, Florida

Beefy guy to group of beefy friends: Pomegranate and Red Bull? That’s heaven in a cup!

–South Beach, Miami

Dumb meatheads to dumb girls: So we’ve got triscuits and flavor‐blasted goldfish back at our condo if you want to come with us.

–Siesta Beach, Florida

Drunk guy #1: You keep condoms and stamps in your wallet?
Drunk guy #2: Yeah.
Drunk guy #1: So what are you gonna do, bang her and send her a thank you note?

–Ft. Lauderdale, Florida

Overheard by: Well, it WOULD be a nice gesture…

20‐something girl, floating on waves: It’s like riding a cowboy… I mean, a bucking bronco.
20‐something friend: Or is it like riding a cowboy who’s riding a bucking bronco?

–WindMark Beach, Florida

Woman: I’m starving! Let’s go get something at Burger King.
Friend: So am I. Hey, did you know that Burger King sells veggie burgers? I just found that out the other day.
Woman: Really? Veggie burgers? What do they use? Like, turkey?

–Panama City Beach, Florida