Girl, as brother attempts to bury her in the sand: Why am I the one who gets to be buried?!
Boy: Cause no one wants to see you. Now lie down!
–Balm Beach, Ontario, Canada
Aunt, looking up at the stars: What is that?
Nephew: Is this the southern or northern hemisphere?
Aunt (giggling): I have no idea.
Cousin, without looking up : That's Orion. You can see Meissa, the star at the top, that's its head. The really bright one is Rigel, that's supposed to be the knee. If you follow the constellation downwards you'll see Sirius.
(blank dumbfounded looks)
Cousin: That's, um, where the aliens from V come from.
Aunt, completely understanding : Ohhhh!
–Beaches of Koh Sumet, Thailand
Dramatic guy to woman at seaside restaurant: DC? Washington, DC, did you ask? DC is a fuckfest!
–Provincetown
Cape Cod, Massachusetts
Drunk guy, plopping down on lounge chair: Oh yeah!
Burly man passed out next to him starts to wake up.
Drunk guy: You are a sex machine!
Burly man: What? Where am I??
–Pool bar, Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: Girl on nearby lounge chair
Boy: So are we ready to go?
(no response)
Boy: Hey!
Girl: Sorry, my eyes were closed.
–Oceanside Beach, California
Girl: So, when Daddy said that his girlfriend was coming to stay the night it was a bad thing?
Mother: Yes, dear.
Girl: Does this mean I get two Christmases and two birthdays, like Ashlee?
–Parua Bay, New Zealand
Overheard by: naughtygurl
Guy: What's the capital of… Iraq?
Girl: Baghdad.
Guy: Lebanon?
Girl: Beirut.
Bimbo: Oh my god, how do you know all this? Have you been to these countries?
Girl #1: Yeah, because they're all such fun places to go visit…
Bimbo: I don't know any capitals except like Australia.
Guy: I'm sure you do, what about New Zealand?
Bimbo: That's a country?!
–Melbourne, Australia
Blonde: So my mom fucked me last night.
Friend: She what?
Blonde: You know, held up her middle finger…
Friend: Um…
–Malibu, California
Teen #1: Is he white?
Teen #2: Yes.
Teen #1: …Wait, does that count Michael Jackson?
–Long Beach Island, New Jersey
