Mother: Both of my daughters are allowed to marry Orlando Bloom if they ever want to. That is one gorgeous boy.
Father: Who’s Orlando Bloom?
Daughter #1: An elf.
Mother: No, he’s not.
Daughter #2: Yes, he is — he was Legolas in the Lord of the Rings.
Father: The elf was played by a black man?

–Carolina Beach, North Carolina

Boy: Good looks!
Girl: Good looks?
Boy: Yeah, that’s what black people say.

–Rockaway Beach, Queens, New York

Overheard by: Sparky

White college girl: Every time I see them, I’m like, “Asians!” and they’re like, “whitey!”

–Long Beach, California

White college girl: Every time I see them, I’m like, “Asians!” and they’re like, “whitey!”

–Long Beach, California

Lady #1: They could have been Koreans.
Lady #2: But they count, don’t they?

–Cape Cod Beach, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Nancy and Andrea

Girl that won’t stop talking: This looks a lot like my mother’s house, but the colors are more tropical because she’s Puerto Rican.

–North Florida

Overheard by: Amused

Girl #1: I think more black people are making their way into the North Shore now!
Girl #2: I know! Yesterday I was at the beach, and I saw a couple of them. But they were being led around by some guy…

–Crane’s Beach, Ipswich, Massachusetts

Girl: He gets so tan!
Guy: I tell you, you look at his hand and you’d think that man was black!
Girl: You know, his mom’s husband is black. That’s why we tease him about that so much.
Guy: Really? His step‐dad is black?
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: Wouldn’t you be pissed?
Girl: Yeah, well, his mom treats him like shit anyway.

Brief pause.

Girl: I’m rethinking the doctor thing.
Guy: Really?
Girl: Yeah, surgeon or oncologist or whatever I become. I wouldn’t be able to have a family.

–Rehoboth, Delaware

Overheard by: kristen

Girl #1: I love Italian men. And black men.
Girl #2: Didn’t you date a half black, half Italian man?
Girl #1: Yeah.
Girl #2: So where’s the ring?
Girl #1: He went back to jail.

–Ocean City, New Jersey

Overheard by: Genevieve

Girl to friend: I’m going to name one of my friends Jew and the other one Hitler, so it would be like Family Feud.

–Tampa, Florida