Man-sluts

And She's Always Blabbing to My Wife

Cute surfer: So, how’s it going? Did you go out with her again?
Really cute surfer: Oh, no, she’s traveling, but I’m waiting for her to come back.
Cute surfer: You’re really into her, right? I thinks she’s hot.
Really cute surfer: Yeah, she’s amazing.
Cute surfer: Have you, like, talked to her about going out again?
Really cute surfer: Yeah, kinda… [Looking away and waving] Hey, dude, stop talking about it. My girlfriend is coming.
Cute surfer: Oh, okay [smiles and waves to girl].

–Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

Overheard by: And I thought he was cute

Hostel II

Swedish guy: Are you the hippies?
Dreadlock guy: I guess so.
Swedish guy: So, you hippies, do you have the orgies?
Dreadlock girl: Um… We decide that on a hippie by hippie basis.
Swedish guy: Oh, because you say ‘Yes,’ and I sign up now.

–Queenstown, New Zealand

Overheard by: sue

At Least, That's What I Heard

Middle-aged guy: Nah, it’s never worth it if you don’t get laid. I mean, I could’ve gotten two hookers for that much!

–Lake Calhoun, Minneapolis, Minnesota

Overheard by: boris the blade

The Day of the Mom-and-Pop Brothel Has Passed

Wife: Yeah, but think of all those Asian girls we fucked. Now think of their husbands and boyfriends…
Husband: Yeah… If I was one of those nerdy, ugly white guys I’d be pulling mad Oriental ass.

–Ocean City, Maryland

Overheard by: lora

… Just Like the Ones on My Penis

Guy: I’ve seen that girl naked more than any other guy at this school, and I’m telling you, man, she has spots all over her vagina.

–West Beach, Beverly Farms, Massachusetts

Willing to Take Responsibility for His Actions, but Unable to Remember Them

Dude in hot tub: Wait, we didn’t do it? So we aren’t in trouble?!

–Carnival Ecstasy cruise

Two Women and a Cat, and He Thinks They're Straight?

Buff dude: Hey, sexy ladies, what’s up?
Girl #1: Not much, just out with my friend and our cat.
Buff dude: You have a cat on the beach?
Girl #2: Of course! People can bring their dogs, can’t they?
Buff dude: Hey, can I pet your pussy?

–St. Petersburg Beach, Florida

Two Women and a Cat, and He Thinks They're Straight?

Buff dude: Hey, sexy ladies, what’s up?
Girl #1: Not much, just out with my friend and our cat.
Buff dude: You have a cat on the beach?
Girl #2: Of course! People can bring their dogs, can’t they?
Buff dude: Hey, can I pet your pussy?

–St. Petersburg Beach, Florida

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