Girl to brother: What are you eating?
Brother: Human remains.
–Tampa, Florida
Girl: What is that?!
Guy, flipping it over: Oh my God. Are those eye sockets?
Girl: Ewww. That’s no jellyfish.
Guy: It looks like an alligator head.
Girl: But alligators aren’t in salt water. Maybe it got lost?
Guy: Look it has a…spine?
Girl: But a head wouldn’t have a-
Woman sitting nearby: -It’s a chicken breast. I just threw it out.
Girl and Guy: Oh.
–St. Augustine, Florida
Overheard by: Cristen
Thin girl ordering funnel cake: I want so much powdered sugar on it that I don't want to be able to see the dough!
–Ocean City, Maryland
Young boy: Look dad, somebody dropped some peanuts.
Male surfer: Sir, I wouldn’t eat them, I think they came out of someone’s rear end.
Young boy: So these are ass nuts? Awesome!
–Florence, Oregon
Overheard by: Johm
Teen Girl: I can't eat this ice cream.
Bruster's Employee: Why not?
Teen Girl: Because it's frozen in the middle.
Bruster's Employee: It's ice cream.
Teen Girl: I know, but it's frozen in the middle and I can't eat it.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Guy: Hey, do you have any gum?
Annoying girl: Yeah, I do… You can't have this one, but you can have this kind. (pulls gum out of bra)
Guy: Ew! I don't want that! It's titty gum.
Annoying girl: It's not titty gum.
Brunette girl: You can have some of my gum.
Guy: Is it in your titties?
Brunette girl, looking down shirt. Nope.
Guy: Okay!
–Canadia
Blond woman, wrapping towel around her waist: I feel like my thighs are too fat to be at the beach.
Gay friend: Well, shit, now they look like they're in a sausage casing. Downgrade.
–Palmetto, Boca Raton, Florida
Girl on cell: Hey! I'm having a barbecue tonight! You should totally come over to my place and drink juice. And by “juice,” I mean sooodaaaa.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Blonde teen to hot dog vendor: How long are your foot-long hot dogs?
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: Hungry-Man-on-the-Beach
