Teens

Teen tourist: Oh my God, there’s a high school over there! Wait, does that mean people actually live here? I thought it was just a tourist place. Weird.

–Aruba

Teen girl #1: Remember when Paul and Diane had sex at the beach last year?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, that shit’s so gross. Have you seen this water?
Teen girl #1: Yeah, there’s so much nasty shit in here.
Teen girl #2: That’s why I’ll only have sex at Jones — it’s much cleaner.
Teen girl #1: Def.

–Rockaway, New York

Overheard by: A. D.

Teen girl #1: Yeah, he would be cute if he had better teeth.
Teen girl #2: Or a smaller nose.
Teen girl #3: He’d be cute if he was completely different.

–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

Drunk teen guy: If I had a vag, I’d totally stick drugs and shit up there!

–Lavalette, New Jersey

Overheard by: I have one, but I don’t

Teen boy: … And you’re so racist.
Teen girl: I’m really not.
Teen boy: It’s okay. I find it sexy.

–Bondi Beach, Sydney, Australia

Overheard by: Api

16‐year‐old girl: Look, a rainbow!
16‐year‐old boy: Yeah… Do you know how rainbows are made?
16‐year‐old girl: Of course — when the sun hits the mountains–
16‐year‐old boy: –Okay, I’m gonna stop you there before you say something stupid.

–Reykjavík, Iceland

Overheard by: RoKKeRiNN

Teenage girl: Aw, look at the little kid. He’s digging a hole to nowhere. How cute!
Teenage boy, completely serious: He’s digging to China, you stupid bitch!

–Long Beach, California

Overheard by: Marie

Teen on phone: Yeah, I’m just getting some breakfast. [To bartender] Can I get a beer?

–Pub, Cape Cod, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Islandhopper

16‐year‐old on phone: So he tried selling you heroin?

–North Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

Overheard by: That guy

Teen boy: Fucking faggots!
Queer: How can he tell I’m gay?
Lesbo: How can he tell I’m a lesbian? What, do we exude a flamboyantly‐homosexual aura or something? Fuck, we’re cuddling with a member of the opposite gender, and people still know we’re gay! Damn, it’s like P.E. class all over again.

–Delta, British Columbia, Canadia