About celebrities

Blonde: I just can’t believe Justin Timberlake can dance like that!
Black guy: I can. It’s 2007 — brothers are intelligent and white girls got booty.

–Venice Beach, Florida

Overheard by: slamber

Mother: Both of my daughters are allowed to marry Orlando Bloom if they ever want to. That is one gorgeous boy.
Father: Who’s Orlando Bloom?
Daughter #1: An elf.
Mother: No, he’s not.
Daughter #2: Yes, he is — he was Legolas in the Lord of the Rings.
Father: The elf was played by a black man?

–Carolina Beach, North Carolina

Girlfriend: Oh my God, I totally look like Paris Hilton.
Boyfriend: Yeah, you’re an overtanned, skinny skank.
Girlfriend, excitedly: I know!!

–Shelly Beach, New South Wales, Australia

Friend #1: You know who’s really hot? Megan Fox.
Friend #2 (in nonchalant agreement): Yeah, she’s really hot. (more excitedly) You know who else is hot?
Friend #1: Who?
Friend #2: That brunette chick from the Transformers movie – damn.
Friend #1: Megan Fox?
Friend #2: Oh.

–Guarujá, São Paulo, Brazil

Cyclist to another: I ran into Jerry Seinfeld and I said, “Jerry, you sold out.”

–Bike Path, Santa Monica, California

Band kid to another: It was both gay and funny, like Jesus and Fergie combined.

–Palm Coast, Florida

Overheard by: Dahbuke

Band kid to another: It was both gay and funny, like Jesus and Fergie combined.

–Palm Coast, Florida

Overheard by: Dahbuke

Guy: Fuckin’ Wonka?
Girl, watching Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory: Yeah man, the orig.

–Dundas, Canadia

Movie critic #1: You know that movie, with Tom Hanks, where he plays the drunk baseball player? And the women are the players because the men are gone?
Movie critic #2: Where?
Movie critic #3: To war.
Movie critic #2: So the women played baseball? That wasn’t a movie.
Movie critic #1: You know, the movie has that star that’s on TV. Bette Davis’ daughter.
Movie critic #3: Who?

Debate goes on for several minutes.

Movie critic #1: Wait, it’s Geena Davis! She’s Betty Davis’ daughter! See the resemblence in the eyes?
Movie critic #3: Didn’t Betty Davis hate Geena because she was tall?
Movie critic #1: Well, she got the part anyway, didn’t she? Geesh, I wish I could remember the name of that movie!

–Nauset Beach, Eastham, Massachusetts

Beach girl in group of people: Wait! Ellen DeGeneres is gay?! Since when?

–Long Beach, California

Overheard by: Colleen