Girl #1: Oh, man! So, for Christmas my dad is letting me get my cartilidge pierced! I’m so excited!
Girl #2: Oh, man, that’s so cool! I want to get mine done, too.
Girl #1: Yeah, I’ll only ever get my ears pierced. Everything else is so gross and weird.
Girl #3: Yeah, well, I have my clit pierced — do you think that’s weird?
Girl #2: What’s a clit?
–Nags Head, North Carolina
20-something college guy: So he was getting the anal beads pulled out, coming at the same time, and he shat all over this girl’s couch.
20-something college girl: Well then what did he do?
20-something college guy: I dunno, he probably wiped his ass and left…
–Casino Beach, Pensacola, Florida
50-something woman: My pee was sort of yellowish today!
Younger friend: (nods earnestly)
–Mission Valley, San Diego, California
Overheard by: Thank Goodness!
Cyclist to her friend: I’ve had trouble sleeping ever since I got zapped by lightning.
–Monterey, California
Overheard by: RhiannonStone
Cyclist to her friend: I’ve had trouble sleeping ever since I got zapped by lightning.
–Monterey, California
Overheard by: RhiannonStone
Chick #1: Why didn’t you kiss me at the pool?!
Chick #2: Because I don’t want to have an open relationship with you!
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Inner city youth on kayak #1: You're paddling like a nigga.
Inner city youth on kayak #2: Shut up, you're black too!
–Catalina Island, California
Overheard by: DanO
Seven-year-old: Dude, your sister needs hotter friends.
Friend: Well, there's the blond one.
Seven-year-old: What's her name?
Friend: I forget.
Seven-year-old: Dude! If they're hot, you remember their names!
–Ocean Beach, New Jersey
Girl to friend: Can I have some of your penis jelly?
–Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
