Beach guy #1: Hurry up!
Beach guy #2: Fellas, what’s the rush? The beach only starts at two!
–Cape Town, South Africa
Beach guy #1: Hurry up!
Beach guy #2: Fellas, what’s the rush? The beach only starts at two!
–Cape Town, South Africa
20‐year‐old speaking to friends: Why didn’t you guys take me to hospital?
–Dee Why Beach, Sydney, Australia
Girl under umbrella: She said her two life goals are to grow a third arm and trip a cripple.
Mom (to friend): She’s a theater kid.
Friend: But still, I don’t see any reason to hurt a disabled person.
–Sea Isle City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Mary
20‐something girl, floating on waves: It’s like riding a cowboy… I mean, a bucking bronco.
20‐something friend: Or is it like riding a cowboy who’s riding a bucking bronco?
–WindMark Beach, Florida
Girl: I really wish I was a vampire, then I could suck people’s blood.
Friend: (completely silent)
Girl: That was kinda creepy sounding, wasn’t it?
Friend: Well, I mean, it’s not a bad thing to like biting people, but it is kinda frowned on to mention it…
–Hawaii
Woman #1: I haven’t had sex in three years.
Woman #2: But what about your friend?
Woman #1: He doesn’t count, because I don’t enjoy it.
–Brittany Beach, France
Guy #1: Hey, man! What’s up?
Guy #2: You don’t return my calls…
Guy #1: I don’t return your Facebook messages.
–Woodbine Beach, Toronto, Ontario, Canadia
Overheard by: Kaley
Hippie girl: Hey, how’s Stone?
Hippie guy: You know — he’s Stone… Oh, wait! He started wearing shoes!
Hippie girl: Well, that is a change!
–Maui, Hawaii