Questions

Child: Does that man have an accent?
Mother: He might just be retarded.

–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: Rex

Dude in hot tub: Wait, we didn’t do it? So we aren’t in trouble?!

–Carnival Ecstasy cruise

30 something guy standing at bar: So she asked me if I had ever slept with a stripper.
Friend: What did you say?
30 something guy: I told her the truth… I said “yeah, I slept with a stripper, of course.”

–Austin, Texas

Pale tourist: Hey, do you have the time?
Bronzed local child: Sure, mister! It’s 12:45.
Pale tourist: Is that Eastern Standard Time?
Bronzed local child, sarcastically: No. It’s local time in Pango-Pango.

–North Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

Overheard by: Geobaldi

Guy: Would you like something to wipe off with?
Girl: No, I prefer to be covered in sand and cum.
Guy: Great! Same time tomorrow?

–Hollywood, Florida

Overheard by: Miles Highclub

Floridian: So, what do you think of Ft. Meyers?
New Yorker: Oh, it's charming.
Floridian: Big word, city girl.

–Ft. Myers, Florida

Blonde teen: On a scale from 1 to 10, how slutty am I?
Brunette teen: 10.
Blonde teen: What? Oh my god, you bitch!
Brunette: You tried to hook up with my father.
Blonde: Oh, yeah…

–Hilton Head, South Carolina

Overheard by: Erin

Guy on cell: Did you just say you killed somebody?!

–Waikiki, Hawaii

Overheard by: gavin

Bald man to baby on blanket (in baby voice): Do you have somethin' to say? Are you thinkin'? Are you thinkin'? Yes you are.
Woman next to him: He's pooping.
Bald man: Are you poopin'? Are you poopin'? Yes you are!

–Sunset Beach, North Carolina

Overheard by: Emma

Young boy, to buxom woman: Are those balls in your bathing suit?

–Reservoir, Arlington, Massachusetts

Overheard by: TC Ledger