Walrusy pink tourist mom, juggling McDonald's bags and towels: Are those seagulls following us?
Dancing pink tourist toddler: I want hanka burger and French-ah fries!
(seagulls swoop over them, attacking the bags)
Dancing pink tourist, shrieking: Oh my god! My French-ah fries!
–St. Peterburg Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Sandy Paws
Hot chick: Like, oh my god, Sarah — just Google ‘How an ugly girl can seduce a hot guy.’
Ugly chick: What’s so good about Google anyway?
Hot chick: Like, oh my god — it’s like, well… Google!
–Glenelg, Australia
Four-year-old girl: Daddy! Why did you knock over my sandcastle?!
Dad: Because you knocked over my sandcastle first.
(dad coolly turns to two-year-old son and begins playing with him)
Four-year-old girl, in hysterics: Daddy! I'm so angry at you!
Mom: Good honey, you're expressing your feelings really well.
–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire
16-year-old on phone: So he tried to sell you heroin?
–North Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Overheard by: That guy
Bedouin girl selling bracelets: Where you from?
Canadian tourist: You are so cute, I am from Canada!
Bedouin girl: Canada dry, never die, Canada dry, never die. You buy bracelet?
–Dahab, Egpyt
Guy #1: Do you like movies?
Guy #2: Movies? Oh yeah, movies!
–Huntington Beach, California
Overheard by: tori
Hot tan girl reading specials board: Does that say tuna and Jews?
Hot pale girl: Um, no. That says “with chips.”
–Crazy Gringo, Weirs Beach, New Hampshire
Girl #1: Do you think a guy would tell you if he had a girlfriend?
Girl #2: Yes, of course he would!
–Belmar, New Jersey
Overheard by: kate
Drunk guy: If my life is their vacation, then why am I fucking broke, eating raw Ramen noodles for dinner, sleeping on the beach with the seagulls every fucking night?
–West Dennis Beach, Cape Cod, Massachusetts
Overheard by: rob
