Babysitter: Hey, do you want to build a sandcastle?
Kid: Yeah! These [feet buried under sand] can be our slave cabins!
Babysitter: Uh, I think it’s time we go swimming.
–Folly Beach, Charleston, South Carolina
Babysitter: Hey, do you want to build a sandcastle?
Kid: Yeah! These [feet buried under sand] can be our slave cabins!
Babysitter: Uh, I think it’s time we go swimming.
–Folly Beach, Charleston, South Carolina
Child: Mommy, how old are you?
Mother: I am forty.
Child: [counting on fingers] Jeez, Mommy, you’re running out of numbers.
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Four-year-old girl, dropping cracker on the floor: Oh, shit!
Mother: Um…no, honey. Not here.
–Steamship Authority Martha's Vineyard Ferry, Massachusetts
Whiny little boy: Mo-ooom, it’s hot!
Mom: Stop that! Whining makes you hot.
–Isle of Palms, South Carolina
Overheard by: Laura and John
Mother: Will you please stop whining?
Small boy: Shut up, Mommy.
–Martell’s Tiki Bar, Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: Trystan
Mother: Danny, go ask those people for a lighter.
Son: Why, Mom?
Mother: So I can light my smoke, baby.
Son: I’m not your baby, and no! They are strange.
Mother: I’ll give you ten bucks.
Son: Okay!
–Shark’s Cove, Oahu, Hawaii
Overheard by: Hope
Toddler grumpily trudging through the sand: Change my diaper!
–Island Park State Beach, New Jersey
Gangsta teen wannabe: Damn, son, check that ho!
Little brother: Which one?
Gangsta teen wannabe: The one with the splat-tat and the muffin top.
Little brother: Daaamn!
Gangsta teen wannabe: Maybe she’ll bend over and show some slut crack.
Mom, studying tourist info: What?
–Cannery Row, Monterey, California
Overheard by: gt6driver
Chubby eight-year-old boy, walking and kicking sand up with his feet: Woah! Ma! Look at this! They've even got real sand here!
Exasperated mom, clutching French fries: No shit! It's real sand! Buying fake sand would be dumb. Everyone would steal it.
–The Bahamas
Overheard by: Fake sand maker
Kayaking girl #1: Mom, where do we go?
Kayaking mom: Oh, why don't we go to the other side of the island?
Kayaking girl #2: No, we can't! I heard they had guns and spears over there–I don't wanna get shot!
–Sugarbay, St. Thomas, South Africa
Overheard by: yams
