Wife to husband: Baby, don’t get out in the water! Those kids will be hanging on you like remoras!
–Grand Isle, Louisiana
Wife to husband: Baby, don’t get out in the water! Those kids will be hanging on you like remoras!
–Grand Isle, Louisiana
Woman: It wasn’t a boob reduction. It was a boob elimination. You know, a man-sectomy.
–Warren Dunes, Lake Michigan
Overheard by: Andrea
Redneck lady coming out of a liquor store: She must have been drunk when she named her kid “Jose Cuervo”.
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Three women are standing outside of a bar.
Woman #1: Let’s go to Fred’s. It’s darker in there.
Women #2 and #3 nod in agreement, and they walk to Fred’s.
–Avalon, Jersey Shore
College girl #1: Oh my God! Look at his bulge!
College girl #2: He must have a huge dick.
Random lady: Sluts!
–Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: tanned tourist
Woman, talking about a topless sunbather: Is that a man?
Guy: No.
Woman: God, that is so not New Jersey.
–South Beach, Miami
Overheard by: Marty
Rich lady with yappy dog: Well, ‘Caucasian’ has ‘Asian’ in it. Then again, there’s a ‘turd’ in every ‘Saturday.’
–Golden Gardens Park, Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Disturbed
Lady: You have an awfully long deck.
Homeowner: Thanks… Oh, you said ‘deck.’
–Topsail Island, North Carolina
Overheard by: Jim
