20-something guy, imitating his girlfriend: Rub my back! Put your dick in me! Me, me, me!
–Santa Monica Beach, California
Overheard by: Diana
20-something guy, imitating his girlfriend: Rub my back! Put your dick in me! Me, me, me!
–Santa Monica Beach, California
Overheard by: Diana
Worried surfer: I’ve been out here four hours and my knob still hasn’t changed color!
–Coogee Beach, Sydney, Australia
Small girl: I want to see a penis.
Father: What?
Small girl: Mommy said we go to the beach to see lots of penises because there are none at home.
–Nauset Beach, Eastham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Total Observer
Little boy, pointing to large drawing of a penis in the sand: Oh my God, that is disgusting. Dad, look, it’s disgusting!! Dad, do you know what it is?
Dad: Yes.
Mom walks over.
Mom: What is it?
–Popham Beach, Maine
Overheard by: Fitzy
Woman #1: Italian men make the best lovers.
Woman #2: Why?
Woman #1: They have lots of stamina. They last longer and their penises are bigger.
Woman #2: What’s the opposite of that?
–Wellfleet, Massachusetts
Teen boy: … And you’re so racist.
Teen girl: I’m really not.
Teen boy: It’s okay. I find it sexy.
–Bondi Beach, Sydney, Australia
Overheard by: Api
Girl to boy showing a picture: This is for Valentine's Day.
Boy: Umm… That's really disturbing, is it a bouquet of penises?
Girl: It's not disturbing! It's for Valentine's. (pause) Wait, did you just say “penises”?
–Tampa, Florida
Guy: I don't understand that song. I mean, how can hips not lie? That's like saying, “my nipples don't argue.”
Friend: Well, my cock never complains.
–Sandy Hook, New Jersey
Overheard by: raerae
