Bimbette looking up at cliff face: Hey, do rocks eat other rocks?
Guy: … Huh?
Bimbette: Do rocks eat other rocks? You know, so that they can grow into bigger rocks…
Guy: Are you serious? No, rocks do not eat other rocks.
Bimbette: Then, like… How do they get bigger?
Guy: [Silence.]Bimbette: Like, what do they eat?
–Merewether Beach, Newcastle, Australia
Kid, looking out at the Atlantic ocean: Is that the ocean?
Dad: I think it’s one of the great lakes.
–Boardwalk, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Fat lady screaming: Taneesha! Homegirl, get yo’ ass in here and see this! There be more sand up in my vah‐jay‐jay than the Saharia desert!
–Dressing room, Montego Bay, Jamaica
Overheard by: Erin
Lifeguard on megaphone: Attention, beach‐goers, due to the sunset, you must get out in 5 minutes or else we will turn the waves off.
Girl: Oh my God! Is he serious?!
–Huntington Beach, California
Mother: Remember: when you have to use the bathroom at the beach, you go in the water, right?
Toddler: Okay, mommy.
–East Hampton, New York
Overheard by: I’ll never swim again
Mother: Remember: when you have to use the bathroom at the beach, you go in the water, right?
Toddler: Okay, mommy.
–East Hampton, New York
Overheard by: I’ll never swim again
Little boy running down the beach: Mother nature’s gone all wrong!
–Santa Monica Beach, California
Overheard by: LilRedSeaglass
Little boy pointing to portabella mushroom: Mommy, what’s that?
Tired mother: It’s a mushroom. Someday I’m going to make you a hamburger for dinner, but instead of meat, it’s going to have one of those mushrooms in it.
Little boy looking back at mushroom, terrified: Why would you do that?!
–Beachside Produce Plus, Melbourne Beach, Florida
Tourist: What happened to the beach? It’s like…buried in sand!
–Mantoloking Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: Shanna
