College girl: Stop hitting on the nine‐year‐old, and let’s leave!

–Grand Bend, Ontario, Canadia

Professor to group of girls covered in whitish goo: What happened to you?
Girl #1: Egg sac war.
Girl #2 and Girl #3: Yeah.
Professor: … Ugh.
Guy: I love this class.

–Fort DeSoto Beach, Florida

Overheard by: There’s nothing like lab in the field

College student #1: Why are they letting their dog in the water with a leash?
College student #2: So it doesn’t fly away!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Freshman bikini girl #1: College classes are much more lame than I thought they would be.
Freshman bikini girl #2: Yeah. I mean, who cares about, like, the difference between Chinese and Japanese?
Freshman bikini girl #1: Yeah! Or algebra! Like anyone even cares!
Freshman bikini girl #2: Do you have more baby oil? 

–Cocoa Beach, Florida

Overheard by: a professor who specializes in Asian cultures

Professor: Are you guys working or just following a stingray?
Student #1: Working!
Student #2: Um…
Student #3: Both.
Professor: Both?
Student #3: We’re using the stingray to randomly decide where to take our next sample. They eat invertebrates — it’s like a divining rod!

–Fergie Shoals, Florida

Overheard by: Justification is for the geeky

Little girl: Are you a mom? You look like a mom.
College student: No. How old do you think I am?
Little girl: Fifteen?

–Palm City, Florida

Overheard by: MBD

Student to friend: I think they should illegalize tobacco, and legalize pot.

–University Campus, Honolulu, Hawaii

University of Miami girl: If I wasn’t me, I’d think I was stupid.

–Miami Beach, Florida

College kid: But I was conceived in Florida, so that means I’m neutral!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Teen to group of college students: Hey… What are you guys up to?
College student: Playing hide‐and‐seek.
Teen: Well, I was looking to get high, but that works too…

–Encinitas, California

Overheard by: Actually was playing hide and seek