Physical Appearance

Cute girl walking down the boardwalk: I’ve been stared at seven times already!
Random guy walking past: Eight.

–Seaside Heights, New Jersey

Overheard by: bonzo

Friend #1: You know who's really hot? Megan Fox.
Friend #2 (in nonchalant agreement): Yeah, she's really hot. (more excitedly) You know who else is hot?
Friend #1: Who?
Friend #2: That brunette chick from the Transformers movie–damn.
Friend #1: Megan Fox?
Friend #2: Oh.

–Guarujá, São Paulo, Brazil

(guy #2 is wearing a jacket in 100-degree weather)
Guy #1: Why can’t you just wear shorts like a normal person?
Guy #2: Why can’t you drink milk with your eyes?
Guy #1: What the fuck?
Guy #2: It’s science, bitch!

–Miami, Florida

Out-of-shape 50-something customer: I don't know, the guys I see riding fixed-gear bikes are in really good shape.
20-something bike salesman: That shouldn't intimidate you; it should inspire you.

–Sag Harbor, New York

Overheard by: the lerpa

Waiter to customer: Sir, you just missed her. She looks hotter. She just got a transplant.

–South Padre Island, Texas

Male tourist speaking in German: Look at that guy's Speedo!
Female tourist speaking in German: Eeew. And his friend really needs to shave his back.
Male tourist speaking in German: I am so glad no one understands what we are saying.
Female tourist speaking in German: I know!

–South Beach, Florida

Overheard by: German-speaker

Dude #1: All I'm saying is, at some point she'll be 23 and damn sexy.
Dude #2: You have a good point.

–Cupsogue Beach, Westhampton, New York

Overheard by: sas

Girl to younger boy: You’re going to be a real lady killer when you’re older.
Younger boy: I’ll kill men, too. I don’t care.

–Ocean City, Maryland

Overheard by: Brittney

Carnie kid: Yo, my friend over there thinks you’re cute.
Girl: Uh… okay.
Carnie kid: He wants to guess your weight.

–Coney Island, New York

Overheard by: carnie lover

White girl, reviewing nude pictures of Hispanic girl: That's why I would hate to be darker. Her vagina looks dirty.

–Deerfield Beach, Florida