Homosexuality

Sorority girl: He’s fucking GAY! How the fuck am I supposed to fuck a fucking gay guy?!

–Galveston, Texas

Young 20-something guy, while texting: Is tranny spelled with one “n” or two?

–Ferry, Fire Island, New York

20-something girl: Guys, did you see the man in the woman's swimsuit over there?
Teen girl #1: Yeah, yeah, I saw him…
20-something girl: He has man legs…
Teen girl #1: But from a distance he could totally pass as a flat chick.
20-something girl: He can really pull it off, too. He has the hat and the glasses and everything.
Teen girl #2: Where's the tranny man? I want to see the tranny man!

–La Jolla, California

Overheard by: La Jollan

Busty tan blonde in yellow bikini, surrounded by 8 beautiful gay men drinking champagne and smoking pot: I mean, we should really just take a picture of this, and put it on a postcard: “Welcome to Venice Beach, bitches.”

–Venice Beach, California

Overheard by: TheLurker

Bikini babe: She’s had sex before… but… like… only strap-on sex. So she’s totally a fake lesbian ’cause she still likes dick!

–Anna Bananas, Honolulu, Hawaii

Overheard by: just getting some beers

Redhead to blonde: So I think he's gay, for serious, I'm not even kidding.
Blonde: What does your dad think?
Redhead: Oh, my dad says that he's “just playing.”
Blonde: Little boys don't play like that.

–La Jolla, California

Stoned nerd (talking about his sub order): I've got six inches!
Stoned girl: Lucky. I got the lesbian choice, a fuckin' sandwich. Cuz the sandwich is like a vagina and the sub is like a dick, ya know?
Stoned nerd: No, I totally understand. And I'm okay with that.

–Wawa, Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Teenage boy #1: I'm gonna grab your nipple.
Teenage boy #2: You better grab my nipple!

–Head of the Fish Regatta, Saratoga Springs, New York

Meth-adict-looking girl: I was born by a massive gay orgy.
Friend: I wish I was born by something…

–Tampa, Florida

Overheard by: Zach

Woman #1: He’s gay, do you really think he has a chance with a straight guy?
Woman #2: Look, we have more of a chance than he does and we have no chance.

–Boca Raton, Florida

Overheard by: Dawne