Tourist: Where do they put the sand in the winter?
Local, sarcastically: Oh, they put it in bags and store it in the convention center.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: OC local
Two girls are dancing in their car, while listening to ‘Boom Boom Boom Boom.’
Driver’s seat: Dude, I wonder if people are staring at us right now.
Passenger’s seat: We’re in a car. No one can see us! We have tinted windows!
Driver’s seat: Dude. All the windows are down.
–Spring Lake, New Jersey
Overheard by: Thank god I have a high IQ
Mother: Stop flicking your ear.
Tween son: I can't. My ear is so awesome.
Mother: You're so retarded sometimes.
Tween son: Like dad?
–Orchard Beach, The Bronx, New York
Overheard by: Pinks
Bimbette: You know what I like?
Brother: …What?
Bimbette: No, I don’t know, I was asking. Like, for serious.
–Kiawah Island Resort, Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: hannah
Teen #1: … And then I got, like, swept out into the Pacific! It was so scary!
Teen #2: Don’t you mean the Atlantic?
Teen #1: Oh, yeah.
Teen #3: You guys are retards. That’s the Gulf of Mexico!
Teens #1 and #2: Ohhh.
–St. Simons Island, Georgia
Overheard by: just out for a walk
Women on cell walking down a 2-mile beach: I am right by the water. Where are you?
–Long Beach, New York
Overheard by: Antzolino
Guy to couple: Hi!
Blonde wife: See, they're nice here, not like in California.
–Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: cherry picker
Friend #1: You know who's really hot? Megan Fox.
Friend #2 (in nonchalant agreement): Yeah, she's really hot. (more excitedly) You know who else is hot?
Friend #1: Who?
Friend #2: That brunette chick from the Transformers movie–damn.
Friend #1: Megan Fox?
Friend #2: Oh.
–Guarujá, São Paulo, Brazil
Father: Okay okay okay, let’s go now.
Tween daughter #1: Why? We have company! Can’t we stay?
Father: I have no coverage here. I have calls to make. I have to work. No work, no play, no food, no house, no fun, no beach, no vacation.
Tween daughter #2: No beach?
Father: How do you think this beach got here? My hard work.
–Nauset Beach, Cape Cod, Massachusetts
Overheard by: amazed observer
