Man on cell: I know — she’s been a proper cunt since she got cancer.

–Freshwater West, Pembroke, Wales

Overheard by: Withy

Tourist guy #1: I never thought you’d look good in Bermuda shorts.
Tourist guy #2: Right.
Tourist guy #1: But you do! You really do!

–Broadsands, South Devon, United Kingdom

American beach-goer #1: I wonder if the people here have trouble understanding us sometimes.
American beach-goer #2: Why would they?
American beach-goer #1: Because of our accents.
American beach-goer #2: But we don’t have accents.

–Edinburgh, Scotland

Stoned girl: It’s really windy today. I wonder what it is on the Richter scale?

–Brighton Beach, United Kingdom

Overheard by: Chicken King

Tired-looking mother: Alice! Heel!

–Hunstanton, England

Overheard by: Dan

Man: It was really impressive to do that with vegetables.

–Weymouth, Dorset, United Kingdom

Overheard by: Carolyn & Clare

Teen guy, to group of pretty girls: Oh my god, that wave was 6 foot 4. That's my height, I'm 6 foot 4!

–Cornwall, England

Overheard by: Beth

Girl looking at others on beach: What freaks!
Guy: Emma, I'm waving a spatula and you're counting waves.
Girl: Logic accepted.

–St. Bees, England

Fat guy on cell: I'm not interested. Throw my food at the dog.

–Rhyl, Wales

Overheard by: Jake

Five-year-old at the beach: This is the worst day of my life!

–Brighton, England