Stupidity

Obnoxiously loud tourist on cell, watching lighthouse: Oh my god! You would just love it here! Everything is so cute and quaint! They even have a building that looks just like a real lighthouse! It lights up and everything!

–Holland State Park, Michigan

Mom #1 (watching her boy): We originally chose the name Eric, but now I'm thinking we should just call him Rick.
Mom #2: But then he would be… Rick James?
Mom #1: Yes. I think it suits him better.
Little boy (running by): I'm Rick James, bitch!
Mom #1: Maybe we should just stay with Eric.

–Baker Beach, San Francisco

Girl #1, about lyrics to song: Who grows weed in their G-string?
Girl #2: That’s ‘hydroponics,’ but I suppose it might be pretty wet down there. It’s not impossible.

–Finucane Island, Australia

Little girl: The Navy’s the one with the boats, right?
Mom: I think so. Let’s ask that guy over there.

–Naval Academy, Annapolis, Maryland

Girl: I'm really allergic to bugs, so that's why I'm scared of jellyfish.

–Destin, Florida

Overheard by: right, because jellyfish are just really big bugs

Rich stoner: Are you sure the bonfire won’t light the sand on fire?

–The Hamptons, Long Island, New York

Overheard by: og pimp

Little girl: If a pig spits in your eye, you'll get the flu.

–Takapuna Beach, Auckland, New Zealand

Young boy, sitting in water and throwing wet sand around: I'm going to bury the beach in sand!

–Patricia Beach, Manitoba, Canadia

Overheard by: think I can say

Man, answering phone: Talbot Street Watersports, how may I help you?
Customer: Oh, what street are you on?
Man: Still on Talbot Street.
Customer: Oh, good… I was just checking.

–Ocean City, Maryland

Overheard by: OC Rocket

Mother to child: What?! Is this writing on your arm? Oh, no…don't say you don't know! Tell me: was it a little magic elf that did this to you?! Was it?!

–Sasco Beach, Fairfield, Connecticut

Overheard by: halliefaith