High school girl #1: Wait, Muhammad Ali the boxer or the dictator?
High school girl #2: What planet do you come from where Muhammad Ali is a dictator?
High school girl #1: Florida.
–West Palm Beach, Florida
High school girl #1: Wait, Muhammad Ali the boxer or the dictator?
High school girl #2: What planet do you come from where Muhammad Ali is a dictator?
High school girl #1: Florida.
–West Palm Beach, Florida
High school girl #1: Wait, Muhammad Ali the boxer or the dictator?
High school girl #2: What planet do you come from where Muhammad Ali is a dictator?
High school girl #1: Florida.
–West Palm Beach, Florida
Girl to friend: I’m going to name one of my friends Jew and the other one Hitler, so it would be like Family Feud.
–Tampa, Florida
Native man: This is where Hawaiians come to celebrate a child’s first birthday with a luau. All the family comes to have a three‐day party by the ocean.
Tourist: How did that get started?
Native man: To protect the babies from the missionaries who loved to eat plump Hawaiian babies.
Tourist, shocked: That wasn’t in my tour book.
Native man: It’s something we keep quiet to protect the white missionaries.
–Kohala, Hawaii
Overheard by: BLondie
Brunette: I’ve always wanted a tattoo, but I don’t think I’m going to get one. You can’t get buried in a Jewish cemetery if you have a tattoo.
Blonde: Why would you want to get married in a Jewish cemetery?
Brunette: Not married. Buried.
Blonde: Oh… So, are you Jewish?
Brunette: Yes.
Blonde: What is it with Jews always wanting to marry other Jews?
Brunette: I guess part of it is that the Jews have been persecuted so much, so people want to make sure to perpetuate the race.
Blonde: Really? Like who? Who persecuted the Jews?
Brunette: Um… well… the Nazis.
–Sandy Hook, New Jersey
Homeless man, frolicking in large waves: Do it again, Poseidon!!
–Ocean Beach, San Diego, California
Overheard by: Daryl
Spin‐doctor chick: Well, really I’ve only slept with three guys.
Realistic chick: Ha! It’s been way more than that. After your last year in college, you’d have to be up to six.
Spin‐doctor chick: Yeah, but two of them were really bad and one was too drunk to finish, so those three don’t count.
–Nantucket, Massachusetts
Overheard by: silently smirking
11‐year‐old Korean boy to 11‐year‐old Egyptian boy: You live in pyramid and you mummy!
–Christchurch, New Zealand
Overheard by: novalis
Chick, passing another reading Brave New World: That girl was reading a book about Columbus, I think.
–East Matunuck State Beach, Rhode Island
Overheard by: it’s got a Savage, but no Columbus
Boy: Dad, who’s more intelligent? The father or the son?
Dad: The father, of course.
Boy: Who invented the telescope?
Dad: Galileo Galilei.
Boy: Why didn’t his father?
–Boracay, Philippines
Overheard by: jkcalma
