Granddaughter: Did you have fun in Hong Kong?
Grandma: Well, yes, there was a lot of Asian food.
Grandpa: And the people were all shorter than you!
Granddaughter: Really…
–Jetty Road, Glenelg, Australia
Granddaughter: Did you have fun in Hong Kong?
Grandma: Well, yes, there was a lot of Asian food.
Grandpa: And the people were all shorter than you!
Granddaughter: Really…
–Jetty Road, Glenelg, Australia
30-something blonde: I was really calm, which is such a feat for me. Especially this day, since I had just bought an ice cream cone and the bottom of the cone was all soggy.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Sweedie
Dad to misbehaving child: Do you want chocolate or a slap?
–Nantasket Beach, Massachusetts
Mom to young child eating a Popsicle: Stop putting that in your mouth! It's done, there's nothing left.
Young woman nearby: That's what he said.
–Long Beach Island, New Jersey
Overheard by: Tara
Mother: We're all set for the picnic!
Random gay dude: Oh, really? Yum! What'd you get us?
Mother: Uh, roast pork sandwiches.
Random gay dude: Ooooh, sounds good! (wanders off)
Mother (whispers): You have to be careful what you say around here.
–East Hampton, New York
Overheard by: pop pop
Female snowbird: Conch fritters? What’s conch?
Male snowbird: Didn’t you read Lord of the Flies? You need the conch shell to talk.
Female snowbird: You want me to eat a ceremonial shell?
–Frenchy’s, Clearwater Beach, Florida
Overheard by: sarah d.
Queer #1, holding apple core: Is this biodegradable?
Queer #2, driving: Yes!
Queer #1: Okay! (tosses it out the window)
–Sandy Hook, New Jersey
Girl #1, looking at fake sex pills: You should get him this one: “One Large Dose of Lovin’.”
Girl #2: Bitch, it’s going to take more than some candy to get him to fuck me!
–Novelty shop, Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: Ava
English girl reading menu: Oh my god. What? It’s all in foreign!
–Beach cafe, Northern France
Overheard by: Jess
