Little girl to mom: The seaweed tickles! It's like Baby Jesus is underwater, tickling my feet himself!
–Vero Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Incredulous
Little girl to mom: The seaweed tickles! It's like Baby Jesus is underwater, tickling my feet himself!
–Vero Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Incredulous
Tourist: What a beautiful day! If it were a girl I’d take her home and eat her pussy out all night!
–Nags Head, North Carolina
Teenage girl in expensive yoga pants to meek mother: Move to France? Why the hell would I move to France? That's the dumbest thing I've heard you say in, like, forever. Stop trying to live your, like, stupid dreams and stuff through me!
–Coffee Shop in the Beach, Toronto, Canadia
Teenage girl to boyfriend: Ew, look. Haley is over there. Whore. She comes here like every day with nothing better to do.
Boyfriend: We come here every day, too.
Teenage girl: Yeah but at least we like, have friends.
–Miami Beach, Florida
Latino guy #1: I'm gonna fuck her so hard she'll feel it in her culo.
Latino guy #2: If she really loved you, she'd let you stick it in her culo.
–Boardwalk, Coney Island, New York
Overheard by: Geni
Obnoxious blonde instructor to riding student: That was beautiful! It looked like water ballet!
–Horse Show, West Palm Beach, Florida
Preteen boy #1, whispering to pal: Dude! Look at that girl lying over there. Her bikini’s pulled up so tight it’s up in her snatch.
Preteen boy #2, whispering back: Quiet… Damn!
Preteen boy #1: What’s that sticking out?
Preteen boy #2: I think it’s hair, dude.
Preteen boy #1: They got hair down there?
[they high-five each other]Preteen boy #1: It’s kind of gross and cool at the same time.
–Padre Island, Texas
Bikini babe: She’s had sex before… but… like… only strap-on sex. So she’s totally a fake lesbian ’cause she still likes dick!
–Anna Bananas, Honolulu, Hawaii
Overheard by: just getting some beers
Poli-sci professor, on international military education and training: It's like going to Harvard… (class is silent) …Harvard grad school. It's really prestigious.
–UC Santa Cruz
California
Loud high school girl: I was walking down the beach and I saw this girl with the fattest vagina! It was like balls!
–Good Harbor Beach, Gloucester, Massachusetts
