Guy: My dick has no boundaries.
–Miami, Florida
Guy: My dick has no boundaries.
–Miami, Florida
Guy on cell: When the freeway ends, turn left…Yes, the freeway ends….Because the continent ends, dipshit.
–Hermosa Beach, California
Dude #1: Bro, you want a beer?
Dude #2: Nah, I'm not drinking for Ramadan.
–Auckland, New Zealand
Guy #1: What's going on? The sun went down but it's still raining?
Guy #2: Dude, why would the sun going down make it stop raining?
Guy #1: No, it totally does! It never rains at night.
–Miami, Florida
Overheard by: Matt
Man #1: Man, I’ve got some sandy nuts. Sannndy nuuuts!
Man #2: Dude, shake it over there. You’re getting your nut-sand all over me.
–Ocean Beach, San Diego, California
Overheard by: Daryl
Guy: Hey, do you have any gum?
Annoying girl: Yeah, I do… You can't have this one, but you can have this kind. (pulls gum out of bra)
Guy: Ew! I don't want that! It's titty gum.
Annoying girl: It's not titty gum.
Brunette girl: You can have some of my gum.
Guy: Is it in your titties?
Brunette girl, looking down shirt. Nope.
Guy: Okay!
–Canadia
Dude in hot tub: Wait, we didn’t do it? So we aren’t in trouble?!
–Carnival Ecstasy cruise
Drunk guy to girl: Hey, heeeeey. Sometimes I think about dolphins.
Girl (annoyed): Okay…
Drunk guy: Yes! See, they have sex for pleasure, like humans.
(girl giggles and walks away with friends)
–Smith Mountain Lake, Virginia