Skater punk to another: Dude, seriously, fuck Picasso.
–Venice Beach, California
Skater punk to another: Dude, seriously, fuck Picasso.
–Venice Beach, California
Teen boy: Yo, you’re hot. How old are you?
Girl: Eleven. But I’m turning twelve in three days.
Teen boy: … Bye.
–Emerald Isle, North Carolina
Guy #1: Dude, dude! Tits.
Guy #2: Where?
Guy #1 motions to a topless sunbather.
Guy #2: Dude. That’s a guy.
–Miami, Florida
Mother with accent, talking to grown son: David, blow up the raft!
David: No! Make dad do it!
Dad: You’re younger. You have more air in your lungs.
Sister: Dave, just blow up the raft.
David: No!
Mother: Son, shut up and finish the blow job.
–Hilton Head, South Carolina
Overheard by: anna
Wet teen boy #1, rubbing eyes: My eyes hurt.
Wet teen boy #2: From the salt?
Wet teen boy #1: Nah. I’ve been outside for two days. They’re used to video game light only.
–Bradley Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: long time mom
Old hairy guy: Welcome to the Pacific Ocean!
Dumb blonde: Huh? The ocean? I thought you said we were going to the beach!
–Beverly Beach, Oregon
Overheard by: please tell me she’s kidding
Old lady at car: Henry, wait for me!
Old man carrying beach chairs half a block ahead of her: Dammit, Agnes, I’m going! I’ve been waiting for you for 40 years!
–Beach near Naples, Florida
Overheard by: X
Guy: Why do you have a wooden fork?
Girl: First of all, because it's biodegradable; and second, it's hard to eat a cupcake.
–Sprinkles, Newport Beach, California
Overheard by: M
Cop, pointing to trash can filled rim with beer and alcohol bottles: Are all of these yours?
Tall man, pointing to one lone bottle: Well, that one's not mine.
–Belmar, New Jersey
Girl: So, yeah, when I get a bit of money together, I’m going to travel around Europe for bit.
Guy: Oh, yeah, really?
Girl: Yeah, I’m probably going to train around the country for a couple of months.
Guy: Oh, so like to India and stuff, yeah?
Girl: Yeah.
–Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: Harrison