Man, carrying two hands full of knives: Knives for sale! Knives for sale! 100 dollars! Getting tired of your brother, your cousin, your mother-in-law? Knives for sale! You feeling suicidal? Knives! Knives for sale! 100 dollars!
–Montego Bay, Jamaica
Overheard by: Elle
Guatemalan teen, passing American teen on the beach: Quieres fumar?
American teen: Huh? What?
Guatemalan teen: Quieres fumar?
American teen: Bro, I don’t know what you’re saying. I don’t speak Mexican or whatever that is.
Guatemalan teen: Want smoke weed?
American teen: Oh. Hell yeah, why didn’t you say that the first time?
–Monte Rico, Guatemala
Overheard by: MangoJoe
Guy: Okay, first person to find a used condom wins a prize!
–Coney Island Beach, New York
Sister: Would you like to see some sea life?
Brother, pointing at three women sunbathing topless: Eww, this isn’t Europe!
Sister: Eli, just look away.
–Rockway Beach, NY
Hippie, to the cat he is walking on a leash: Did you eat my pot?
–Ocean Beach, San Diego
Man: Come back in the water with me.
Boy: No. You tried to drown me! You almost killed me!
Man: Well. You shouldn't have kicked me.
Boy: Kickin' someone in the ding-dong ain't gonna kill them.
Man: It might.
–Destin, Florida
Guy #1: Nice tie.
Guy #2: Yeah, I got it from a relative.
Little girl: No, you didn’t, Daddy. You got it from me.
–White Rock Beach, British Columbia, Canadia
Overheard by: Dan-Mission, B.C.
Chick: Fuck, I stepped on a piece of glass!
Dude: Was it beach glass?
Chick: I don’t know… We’re at the beach… Probably.
–Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: monkey
Dwarf to drunk chick at bar: So, have you ever had a dwarf go up on you?
–Manistee, Michigan
Overheard by: Gabby
Guy: Two for Wanted.
Pregnant girl: You don't need to buy my ticket. I brought money.
Guy: It's the least I could do, after knocking you up.
Pregnant girl: Good point.
–Cape May, New Jersey
