Hippie, to the cat he is walking on a leash: Did you eat my pot?
–Ocean Beach, San Diego
Hippie, to the cat he is walking on a leash: Did you eat my pot?
–Ocean Beach, San Diego
Man: Come back in the water with me.
Boy: No. You tried to drown me! You almost killed me!
Man: Well. You shouldn't have kicked me.
Boy: Kickin' someone in the ding-dong ain't gonna kill them.
Man: It might.
–Destin, Florida
Guy #1: Nice tie.
Guy #2: Yeah, I got it from a relative.
Little girl: No, you didn’t, Daddy. You got it from me.
–White Rock Beach, British Columbia, Canadia
Overheard by: Dan-Mission, B.C.
Chick: Fuck, I stepped on a piece of glass!
Dude: Was it beach glass?
Chick: I don’t know… We’re at the beach… Probably.
–Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: monkey
Dwarf to drunk chick at bar: So, have you ever had a dwarf go up on you?
–Manistee, Michigan
Overheard by: Gabby
Guy: Two for Wanted.
Pregnant girl: You don't need to buy my ticket. I brought money.
Guy: It's the least I could do, after knocking you up.
Pregnant girl: Good point.
–Cape May, New Jersey
Random guy named Mike, after hitting on girl for twenty minutes: You know, I've always wondered, can crabs get crabs?
–Ship Bottom, Long Beach Island, California
Overheard by: beachweek '06
Guy to woman: I'm not going to have a nervous breakdown like you did, and I'm not going to have irritable bowl syndrome like John. I'm going to visit mom less often.
–Manhattan Beach, New York
Girl: I had this weird dream about anal sex last night. I think it was from when you were joking around when I was bent over the sink before.
Boy: I wasn’t joking around.
–Bradley Beach, New Jersey
Ditzy blonde: Oh my god, Stuart, there is something gooey on my towel!
Stuart: Where did you get the towel from?
Ditzy blonde: Next to your bed.
Stuart: Oh, um…it must be hair gel!
–Terrigal, Australia
