Queer #1: That guy in the blue footy shorts is so hot!
Queer #2: Ewww, Matt, he looks lower class.
Queer #1: We suck cock for a living — you really think we’re classy?
Queer #2: Well, I know I am. I dress in nothing but designer.
–Bondi Beach, Sydney, Australia
Overheard by: Hot Chick
Girl: So, out of all the people in this circle, who have you been sexually involved with?
Queer: Does pecking count?
Girl: Yes.
Queer points at everyone.
Girl 1: You man-whore! So, if pecking doesn’t count, who have you done anything with?
Queer: Everyone except her.
Girl: So you’re still a whore.
–Centennial Beach, British Columbia, Canadia
Overheard by: shutterbug
Gay guy, after boy holds his hand: Ooooh! I finally get a little PDA!
Chick: Ew! TMI! Who's little Petey? Why would you name it that?
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: aoK
Queer #1: Charles, look, there’s another one. He’s white, and the other looks Asian.
Holds up large signs that say “6” and “4,” respectively.
Queer #2: Definitely!
Queer #1: Oh, wow. Look at this one. Latino. Yummmm!
Holds up sign that says “9.”
Queer #2: Oh, yes. Totally!
Straight girl, walking by: What are you two doing? Comparing guys’ looks?
Queer #1: Uhh…
Queer #2: Breeder, please. The Asian guy is a 4, the white guy is a 6, and the Latino guy a 9. What do you think we’re trying to imagine?
–Sunset Beach, Florida
Overheard by: MangoJoe
Busty tan blonde in yellow bikini, surrounded by 8 beautiful gay men drinking champagne and smoking pot: I mean, we should really just take a picture of this, and put it on a postcard: “Welcome to Venice Beach, bitches.”
–Venice Beach, California
Overheard by: TheLurker
Drag queen, dressed as a princess with a mop: Come in and have a drink! Best place around!
Straight girl: What are you cleaning?
Drag queen: Girl, it gets messy around here, can't you see? (proceeds to use mop on girl's glasses)
–Fire Island, New York
Overheard by: Cordelia
Papi #1: Oh, he’s so nice! You know, he’s 36, but he doesn’t look any older than 34!
Papi #2: That’s hot.
Translated from the Spanish
–Miami Beach, Florida
Furious teenage boy to other teens: Just because you call “no-homo” before you do something doesn't mean it's not gay!
–Coney Island, New York
Queer: He looks so elegant, even when he’s not in drag!
–Provincetown, Massachusetts
Overheard by: DJ Oakes
Queer looking at screaming queer in water: Maybe I’m not gay.
–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: laughing entirely too much
