But You Had to Get All Pissy about that Whole Rape Thing

Girl #1: Hey, see those guys we went out on the date with that time?
Girl #2: Where?
Girl #1: Up there with the big-ass cooler and grill. I told you we shoulda gone out on another date with them. We coulda been up there drinkin’ beer and eating hot dog right now.

–Cabbage Beach, Paradise Island, Bahamas

Overheard by: d

Posted on February 8, 2026
Bimbettes, Central America, Dating, Drinking, Food, Friends, Gripes

When the Doors of Perception are Cleansed, Man Will See Her Ass as It Truly is: Infinite

Woman: That bitch must have one of those fun house mirrors that she looks thin in, because that ass in that suit is just wrong, wrong, wrong.

–Playa Del Carmen, Mexico

Posted on February 7, 2026
Fashion, Gripes, Insults, Ladies, Mexico

What Would Your Social Life Be Without It?

Girl, noticing bird poop on leg: Oh, shit! Why do I always get pooped on?!

–Oval Beach, Michigan

Overheard by: Steph

Posted on January 31, 2026
Animals, Girls, Gripes, Michigan, Poop, Questions

So Cancer Is Just Your Body Trying to Get Back to the Womb?

Amateur oncologist: Having a baby? That’s like growing a tumor with a brain inside of you.

–Good Harbor Beach, Gloucester, Massachusetts

Overheard by: concerned citizens

Posted on January 26, 2026
Assholes, Gripes, Health & Hygiene, Massachusetts, Stupidity

Payback's a Bitch

Saggy-drawered kid: That woman carrying shit on her head.
Mother: Boy, you ain’t in Brooklyn anymore. This place different. And keep your voice down.
Saggy-drawered kid: Hell, she don’t speak English. And what the hell computer boy gonna do, report me to the internet?

–Tela Beach, Honduras

Overheard by: Computer boy, I assume

Posted on January 18, 2026
Assholes, Central America, Geography, Gripes, Language Barrier, Moms, Physical Appearance, Should've used a condom, Stupidity

The Voices in My Head aren't Real, but They Make More Sense than My Mommy

Woman to six-year-old son repeatedly throughout the day: Get away from me. Go away! I said leave! I don’t want you here… Come back here where I can see you.

–Goddard State Park, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Claudia

Posted on January 17, 2026
Advice, Geography, Gripes, Moms, Stupidity, Virgin Islands

Eternal Vigilance Is the Price of Sexy

Teen girl #1: I thought you hated bikinis.
Teen girl #2: I do.
Teen girl #1: Why are you wearing one?
Teen girl #2: Because even though I look fat in it, guys don’t look at you if you’re in tankinis.
Teen girl #1: But it’s okay for them to see your fat.
Teen girl #2: At least this way you look, and if you catch it on time, you just suck in!

–Vineyard Haven, Massachusetts

Overheard by: bikinibabe