Outraged hippie chick: Someone drew a pentagram in my Zen garden!
–Seal Beach, California
Outraged hippie chick: Someone drew a pentagram in my Zen garden!
–Seal Beach, California
Girl: I’ve counted more than 70 sparkly purses on the boardwalk tonight. What’s wrong with these people?
Guy #1: Every year it’s a new beach trend.
Guy #2: You’ve counted 70 purses? The question is what’s wrong with you.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Young woman: I am so not doing that again. One, it’s gross, and two, my legs are killing me.
–Chatham Light Beach, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Antonia
Daughter: You’re sticking out, mom.
Mother: What’s sticking out?
Daughter: Your pubic hair.
Mother: Is it gray?
Daughter: Um, no, not really.
Mother: I’m gonna take a nap.
–Destin, Florida
Overheard by: Hard not to laugh out loud
Grandmother: So you’re not in a fight anymore?
Little boy, hugging little girl: We’re gettting married!
Grandmother: But you’re cousins.
Little boy: No, I mean when we’re older.
Grandmother: But you’ll still be…Never mind.
–Ortley Beach, New Jersey
Teen girl: I can’t believe I’m drunk! I’m drunk! In Italy! I am 17 and drunk. Oh yeah, and I’m with my parents! The first time I’m drunk, in a foreign country, under 21, with you people, and I’m in Italy?
Teen girl’s mother: It is better this way. At least you are with people who care.
–Nova Siri, Italy
Overheard by: only other american in the place
Chick: Okay, that girl over there is the ugliest girl I’ve ever seen.
Dude: You’re so mean. [Dude looks] Oh my god!
Chick: I told you!
–Sea Isle City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Cols
Preggers: They really shouldn’t let fat people go here. It’s disgusting with their stomachs all poking and out and shit. At least make them wear a shirt!
Other chick: You’re seven months pregnant and wearing a bikini. Doesn’t that include you, too?
Preggers: Shut up, bitch. Of course I don’t count. Guys dig sexy pregnant women.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: Glynnis O
Woman: Is that where George Bush lives?
Man: No, you can’t see it from here.
Woman: I bet you could see it with binoculars or something.
Man: Doubt it.
Woman: Why do you always shut me down when I have an opinion? I’m entitled to it! How do you know you couldn’t see George Bush’s house from here?
Man: There’s an island in the way.
–Kennebunk Beach, Maine
