Gripes

Little boy with ice cream: They gonna manhandle me!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Audrey

Girl on cell: Dude, you could buy a whole bag full of dildos, and he would never know.

–Oceanside, California

Overheard by: groovychica

American girl, looking at girl with shaved head: Oh my God, I feel soo bad for her.
American friend #1: ‘Cause she has cancer?
American friend #2: Or she’s a dyke.
American girl: Either way, it sucks!

–Herzliya Beach, Herzliya, Israel

Man: Shit. I hate him so much. He gets me so mad sometimes. He makes me so mad I wanna fuck him hard in the ass.

–Coney Island, New York

Girl #1: I lost my fucking phone the other day.
Girl #2: Oh no, I hate when that happens.
Girl #1: I know, right? I never know what the time is now!

–St. Kilda Beach, Melbourne

Overheard by: Alex

Teen boy, looking at boogie board: Oh, man… My nipples are gonna get it.

–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: Kate H

Guy pointing out girl with tampon string hanging out of her bikini: Dude, that chick is either on her period, or she just fucked a tea bag.

–Bronte Beach, Sydney, Australia

Overheard by: Hamish The Li

English girl reading menu: Oh my god. What? It’s all in foreign!

–Beach cafe, Northern France

Overheard by: Jess

Preppy 60-something #1: Now you only owe me 10,463 martinis.
Preppy 60-something #2: Yep, she owes me a bunch, too.

–Kennebunkport, Maine

Overheard by: Amused Locals

Woman #1: I don’t mind sand in my bathing suit or sand up my butt, but I don’t want sand in my mouth!
Woman #2: Really?
Woman #1: Yup!
Woman #2: Well, I guess that makes sense. There are a lot of things I would rather have in my butt than in my mouth.

–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: velma