Mexican tour guide: Virgin women between the ages of 19-24 were sacrificed at the top of the main temple to the sun god–
Bored Brit #1: –What he really means is that all the pretty birds had already been laid so they had to sacrifice the ugly birds for the benefit of the future civilization.
Bored Brit #2: I don’t care. All I want to do is run to the top of that little temple, have a fag, and look at the ocean.
–Cancun, Mexico
Little girl: Mom, the water is cold.
Mom: Well, honey, it’s only August. When we come back in September, the water will be much much warmer.
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Chick #1: Why didn’t you kiss me at the pool?!
Chick #2: Because I don’t want to have an open relationship with you!
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Chick: Fuck, I stepped on a piece of glass!
Dude: Was it beach glass?
Chick: I don’t know… We’re at the beach… Probably.
–Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: monkey
Little boy with ice cream: They gonna manhandle me!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Audrey
Girl on cell: Dude, you could buy a whole bag full of dildos, and he would never know.
–Oceanside, California
Overheard by: groovychica
American girl, looking at girl with shaved head: Oh my God, I feel soo bad for her.
American friend #1: ‘Cause she has cancer?
American friend #2: Or she’s a dyke.
American girl: Either way, it sucks!
–Herzliya Beach, Herzliya, Israel
Man: Shit. I hate him so much. He gets me so mad sometimes. He makes me so mad I wanna fuck him hard in the ass.
–Coney Island, New York
Teen boy, looking at boogie board: Oh, man… My nipples are gonna get it.
–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: Kate H
