Bimbettes

Blonde #1: Are you wearing that sunscreen that tastes good?
Blonde #2: What?
Blonde #1: Your sunscreen smells really good. Is it the kind that tastes good?
Blonde #2: How do you know how sunscreen tastes?
Blonde #1: Oh, I’ll tell you later.

–Natural Bridges, Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: just trying to get a tan

Girl #1: Rhinos have two horns.
Girl #2: I thought they had one, like a unicorn.
Girl #3: Aren’t unicorns extinct?

–Kenai, Alaska

Girl #1: So anyway, when me and Dale went shopping last night–
Girl #2: —No! ‘Dale and I’…
Girl #1: … No, you didn’t come.

–Hotel, Sydney, Australia

Lady #1: You can take that dog on board?
Lady #2: Sure, but he has to be small enough to fit under the seat in front of you. And you have to pay 75 dollars for each leg.
Lady #1: 75 dollars for each leg of the dog?!

–Tampa airport, Florida

Two girls are dancing in their car, while listening to ‘Boom Boom Boom Boom.’

Driver’s seat: Dude, I wonder if people are staring at us right now.
Passenger’s seat: We’re in a car. No one can see us! We have tinted windows!
Driver’s seat: Dude. All the windows are down.

–Spring Lake, New Jersey

Overheard by: Thank god I have a high IQ

Bimbette: You know what I like?
Brother: …What?
Bimbette: No, I don’t know, I was asking. Like, for serious.

–Kiawah Island Resort, Charleston, South Carolina

Overheard by: hannah

Girl: We need to date boys who are smart and rich. Our boyfriends are stupid and poor and don’t even have the same wireless provider as us.

–Laguna Beach, California

Bimbette looking at guy reading GRE study guide: What’s that?
Guy: Huh? [Bimbette points to title.] It’s a test I need to take to get my Master’s. [Bimbette looks confused.] It’s like the SATs for graduate school.
Bimbette: So you’re, like, smart and shit. [Guy stares at her and then walks away.]

–St. Pete Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Chicagoan in FL

WASP girl: I saw three of them, and they all looked the same. I think they were Mexicanese?

–Bar Harbor, Maine

Overheard by: dulcineaesq

Teenage girl: So I’ve decided not to be a slut anymore.

–Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey