Girl to friend: It's so hot. I'm icing my nipples, and they're not even getting erect.
–Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: Yep, it's really that hot
Girl to friend: It's so hot. I'm icing my nipples, and they're not even getting erect.
–Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: Yep, it's really that hot
Boyfriend, offering a sip of shake: Here, have some.
Girlfriend: No, I’m okay.
Boyfriend: Have some, it’s protein!
Girlfriend: No! I’ll just suck your dick later.
Boyfriend: [Silence.]
–South Beach Florida
Teen girl #1: Why the hell are we here?
Teen girl #2: Because we have nothing better to do.
Teen girl #1: Wait… why didn’t we call that guy who did that porno after high school? He’ll do us both.
–Ashwaubomay Lake, Ashwaubenon, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Lacy Magnolia
Girl: So, I've finally decided what I want to do in life. I'm done with modeling. I am going to create a product, and sell it for charity.
Guy: Oh, that's cool. What's the charity?
Girl: I haven't decided yet. I'm still working on it.
Guy: Oh, okay.
Girl: I need to decide on the product too.
–Miami Beach, Florida
Girl #1: I didn’t break any of the 10 Commandments today ’cause I was on a plane.
Girl #2: What’s a plane?
–Malibu, California
Ana #1: Oh my god, look at that guy. He’s huge!
Ana #2: Like, really, someone needs to introduce him to Weight Watchers or something!
Girl passerby: Hey, snugglebutt! [Gives large guy hug and kiss.]Ana #1: What the fuck?
Ana #2: Girlfriend? That fat whale?
Girl passerby: Husband. And you two might have men in your lives if you actually had boobs rather than a caved-in skeleton chest. Come on, schnookums, let’s go get some ice cream.
–Westerly, Rhode Island
Overheard by: blanket not far away, lauging my ass off
Guy: Fuckin' Wonka?
Girl, watching Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory: Yeah man, the orig.
–Dundas, Canadia
