Girls

Chick: Fuck, I stepped on a piece of glass!
Dude: Was it beach glass?
Chick: I don’t know… We’re at the beach… Probably.

–Santa Monica, California

Overheard by: monkey

30-something blonde: I was really calm, which is such a feat for me. Especially this day, since I had just bought an ice cream cone and the bottom of the cone was all soggy.

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Sweedie

Girl to friend: Can I have some of your penis jelly?

–Ft. Lauderdale, Florida

Girl on cell: Dude, you could buy a whole bag full of dildos, and he would never know.

–Oceanside, California

Overheard by: groovychica

Girl: I had this weird dream about anal sex last night. I think it was from when you were joking around when I was bent over the sink before.
Boy: I wasn’t joking around.

–Bradley Beach, New Jersey

Ditzy blonde: Oh my god, Stuart, there is something gooey on my towel!
Stuart: Where did you get the towel from?
Ditzy blonde: Next to your bed.
Stuart: Oh, um…it must be hair gel!

–Terrigal, Australia

Chick #1: I think I need glasses or something, I can't even read the name of this song.
Chick #2: That's because your iPod is so scratched up.
Chick #1: Oh.

–Ashwaubomay Park Beach, Green Bay, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Melanie

Chick #1: I think I need glasses or something, I can't even read the name of this song.
Chick #2: That's because your iPod is so scratched up.
Chick #1: Oh.

–Ashwaubomay Park Beach, Green Bay, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Melanie

American girl #1: So, did you bring the book?
American girl #2: What book?
American girl #1: The book.
American girl #2: Ohh… Ant farm?
American girl #1: No. The bible. Fucking idiot.

–Aix en Provence, France

Overheard by: Ant Farm pretty much IS the Bible

Girl to friend: Fuck me up the ass, just don't tell me you love me!

–Manitowoc, Wisconsin