Girl #1: That motherfucker is totally going to hit us with his ball.
Girl #2: Assholes… They just don’t know how to act.
Girl #1: Yeah, man. Shit, where’s my top?

–Atlantic City, New Jersey

Teenage girl: I know, he has the most beautiful eyes and this insanely hot body and I’m sad because his girlfriend has this really big forehead!

–Jones Beach, New York

Overheard by: sara swank

Mermaid to another: I’d be a lot less naked, but I just got sick of gluing seashells to myself.

–Mermaid Parade, Coney Island

Overheard by: shorty j

Girl: Am I going to have big boobs?
Flat‐chested mom: Um, probably not.
Girl: But boys like big boobs!
Flat‐chested mom: Only dumb boys do, because only dumb girls have big boobs.
Girl, after thinking for a minute: Grandma has huge ones.
Flat‐chested mom: Oooh, look at the pretty birds!

–Panama City Beach, Florida

Blonde: Why did they make the sun so hot?

–Tampa, Florida

Teen girl #1: Have you been going to church lately?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, I found a new church I really like.
Teen girl #1: Really?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, it like smells all creepy, and, like, they speak in tongues. It is really scary, so I will probably go to this one!
Teen girl #1: Cool. Maybe I’ll go with you.

–Shilshole Beach, Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Why do those people have goatskins on?

Teen girl #1 is making a crease in her towel and filling it with sand.

Teen girl #2: What the fuck are you doing?
Teen girl #1: Look! It’s ‘de Nile’!
Teen girl #2: What? You mean the Nile River? How could that be the Nile River? There’s no water involved!
Teen girl #1, after long pause: Well… Has anyone ever told you that you look like Danny DeVito?

–Jericho Beach, British Columbia, Canadia

Overheard by: bondgirl

Guy to girl: I’m going set up booby traps round your house!
Girl to guy: Oooh, booby traps, I like the sound of that…

–Tampa, Florida

Little girl: Lifeguard! Lifeguard! What do crabs eat?
Lifeguard: Little girls.

–Riis Park, New York

Guy: It smells like pussy out here!
Girl: It smells like you’re gonna have to find someone else to give your ass a ride home.

–Bixby Knolls, Long Beach, California

Overheard by: Armando