Girls

Girl: Ooh, it's so pretty here…like on Lost!
Guy (stepping around litter): Yeah, complete with used diapers.

–South Padre Island, Texas

Overheard by: The Other

Drunk man: [Bumps into girl and puts his hand around her to move her aside.] Sorry.
Girl: Eww! You’re dirty!
Drunk man: C’mon, you know you like it!
Girl: Eww! [Drunk man walks away.] Call me!!

–Manhattan Beach, California

Overheard by: Snoog

Teen girl #1: Are you done yet?
Teen girl #2: Still haven’t done it yet… By the way, you might not want to get in the way of the current!
Boy: Gross! She’s peeing!
Teen girl #2: Shhh! Everyone can hear you!

–Long Beach Island, New Jersey

Daughter to mother: You yell at me for saying ‘munted,’ ‘fucked,’ ‘wasted,’ and ‘shafted,’ because you say they all mean ‘having sex.’ So for the love of god, when you tell that story will you stop saying you were ‘stiffed’ by an old lady?!

–New Zealand

Girl: I didn’t realize my nipples were dark until I went to sleep-away camp and the girls in my tent were like: “Um. Wow.” I went topless in Jamaica and they were, like, black when I came back.

–Long Beach, Long Island, New York

Overheard by: Colleen

Teenage girl: I hate my sister so much… She's so fat! And I just really hate fat people.

–Cedar Creek Beach, Nebraska

16-year-old girl holding sand crab: Look! I found a frog… or something.

–Seaside Heights, New Jersey

Overheard by: Ashley

Girl to friend: I don't think I'm going to go into the water. I'm going out later, and sand in my crotch just makes me grumpy.

–Santa Monica Beach, California

Boy with pretty eyes: So I told her “porch monkey” is a racial slur.
Girl with squinty eyes: Yeah?
Boy with pretty eyes: And she says she doesn't know anybody named Rachel.
Girl with squinty eyes: Yes she does, her cousin's name is Rachel.

–St. Pete Beach, Florida

Girl: I'm really allergic to bugs, so that's why I'm scared of jellyfish.

–Destin, Florida

Overheard by: right, because jellyfish are just really big bugs