Sensory Experiences

Dude #1: You know, that guy we call Ass.
Dude #2: You call the guy Ass? Why?
Dude #1: Because he smells like ass. Do you want to hear the rest of my story or not?

–Plum Island, Massachusetts

Little boy: I can’t believe we went under. I still have that taste in my mouth!
Dad: Get used to it. You’ll be tasting that your whole life.

–Horseneck Beach, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Kp & Cd

Father at table with whole family, after female scream is heard: Wow, that sounds like my wife's orgasm. I'm hammered!

–Catalina Island, California

Waspy overexcited college guy: And then after? Can we suck helium? Please!

–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: kgw

Blonde #1: Are you wearing that sunscreen that tastes good?
Blonde #2: What?
Blonde #1: Your sunscreen smells really good. Is it the kind that tastes good?
Blonde #2: How do you know how sunscreen tastes?
Blonde #1: Oh, I’ll tell you later.

–Natural Bridges, Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: just trying to get a tan

Little girl: Guess what Daddy told me, Mommy!
Mother: What’s that?
Little girl: When you sweat, it’s like your skin is peeing all over you!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Mandy

Seven-year old boy: Those boys over there are looking at you.
Bronzed teen sister in bikini: Oh really? [Looks pleased.]Seven-year old boy: Yeah. I guess it’s cause you have that weird sunburn.

–Liberia, Costa Rica

Older guy: We had dinner there earlier in the week. I got food poisoning.
Young kayaking guide: Really? Was it good?

–York Beach, Maine

Teen girl to teen boy: Well, it ain't gonna lick itself!

–Gunnison Beach, Sandy Hook, New Jersey

Mother: Do you know how dogs introduce themselves to each other?
Eight-year-old daughter: No, how?
Mother: They sniff each other's butts.

–Guam

Overheard by: Nadine